The most important lesson a teacher can teach a child: Learning from failure. by alvinauh

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· @alvinauh · (edited)
$66.94
The most important lesson a teacher can teach a child: Learning from failure.
<center>![](https://steemitimages.com/DQmbRGqUDfybSoCGsPKvoJ6oKjU8aL5XWJsuevQ5DCxJWwX/image.png)
[Image source](https://www.google.com/url?sa=i&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=images&cd=&cad=rja&uact=8&ved=0ahUKEwi5y4Dd1cjYAhXKN48KHb3EA3kQjRwIBw&url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.linkedin.com%2Fpulse%2F20141023130248-2279231-never-failed-that-s-a-failure&psig=AOvVaw0dIVkWYfjcqSOGQUF9OQkH&ust=1515511298542719)</center>

The question of what should be taught to a child may vary from culture to culture. However, one skill stands out amongst all, that is the ability to learn from failure. None of us are born perfect without any shortcomings, I remember being bad at everything, I was not good academically nor in sports.

I was so bad with my studies that when I went back to visit my teacher, I was told, repeatedly throughout our 2-hour conversation that he did not expect me to be where I am today. Looking back, it was through failure that lessons can be learnt.

The ability to learn from failure does not mean failing and just failing, there is an art to failing, after many years of teaching, the significance of failure is indeed great. However, it is important to know exactly how to use failure to one's advantage. In it, there are a few stages that children go through. It is through identifying these stages and from there, help the children find meaning in such failure. This is important because the lesson that failure brings can be quickly mitigated with how society sees failure. Handled poorly, it can cause the child to be unwilling to try out new things which may impede learning in the long run. 

### **The loss**

<center>![](https://steemitimages.com/DQmf9kC1K1GhcHz9NLQjNMSaWHqqecDfscqtMyGKiuEYsEE/image.png)
[Image source](https://www.google.com/url?sa=i&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=images&cd=&cad=rja&uact=8&ved=0ahUKEwjUp-jY1sjYAhUESI8KHQyFDn8QjRwIBw&url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.healthyplace.com%2Fself-help%2Fadhd%2F5-ways-to-deal-with-adhd-and-feeling-like-a-failure%2F&psig=AOvVaw2pYpz73XcYiM3M0rTsxRr0&ust=1515511554211271)</center>

This is often the first stage of failure. The loss is the stage where the failure occurs and it normally involves some kind of loss. This may encompass a loss of confidence, a loss of a prize or loss of any kind. In this situation, the teacher's role is important and it can make or break the child. I remember growing up, I am normally met with anger and disappointment whenever I fail. This has made me overly cautious in trying out anything outside of my comfort zone. 

I noticed the same response in most of my students. Whenever they fail, there will be this brief moment of pause where they would stare at the teacher, waiting for the teacher to unleash his or her fury at the child. However, I noticed that switching the focus from failure to the positive aspects of the failure does help. I remember telling a child who received a D for an exam paper that I was very proud of him. He was very confused after my statement. I explained that it was not the results that mattered but the improvement. I projected that if he were to continue what he was doing, he would be getting an A very soon. 

That led him to the next stage. 

### **The climb**

<center>![](https://steemitimages.com/DQmTX1NzR6z5UK4JjFHWomGp9vwMGFAPS9LjjTyaQHcwqRk/image.png)
[Image source](https://www.google.com/url?sa=i&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=images&cd=&cad=rja&uact=8&ved=0ahUKEwiRqcKx18jYAhWKK48KHeZqBtkQjRwIBw&url=http%3A%2F%2Fimgfave.com%2Fview%2F3166878&psig=AOvVaw29I7fBE8kLnqjposnNXEUX&ust=1515511715987570)</center>

Just like that song from Miley Cyrus, it is indeed true for anyone deciding to make the climb be it in their studies, work or sports. The problem with the climb is that you have to want it. Or else, it is literally an uphill battle for the teacher. I started wanting to do better because I wanted to. I knew that the bad results meant that there was a lesson to be learnt and that has led me to improve. I learnt this when I was representing my school in the state level swimming tournaments. Winning the medals was fun, but the main prize was qualifying for the national level tournaments. 

It was not easy, it required many hours of training, but I could choose to drop out any time. I chose to be put through the dieting, the grueling training and the pain. I understand that my students have to face similar challenges as well and as their teacher, all I can do is to encourage them when they falter and push them until they have finally succeeded. I had a student who had a fear of putting his head into the water. It took much encouragement and motivation to help the student be willing to even try, powering through the discomfort to success. 

The key here is to encourage the child to be willing to try and to 'climb' through all the challenges faced. Once the child has succeeded, the next step serves as a continuation to the child's learning journey. 

### **The push forward**
![](https://steemitimages.com/DQmQereABbg2rDNdGojkzPzKuU6oPAqR6E8zXDcSx9meagT/image.png)
<center>[Image source](https://www.google.com/url?sa=i&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=images&cd=&cad=rja&uact=8&ved=0ahUKEwiw3PnO18jYAhUJNI8KHYOnAakQjRwIBw&url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.t-nation.com%2Ftraining%2F5-best-exercises-ever&psig=AOvVaw1EIIU0XVgzkOujQPsIa2Up&ust=1515511814984129)</center>

I would normally tell the child at this point that I am proud of his/her success. I will tell the child that it was through the willingness to try, to strive that has led her/him to success. I would then suggest other areas in which this success can be built upon. While this may sound very ambitious, it is not, learning is a life-long journey. Thus, failure will likely be part of it, and if the child is willing to strive, no matter how fast the world changes, no matter the challenge, they will be able to rise above it. That is because at this point, it is likely that they will not give up on the first sign of failure and would strive towards success.


<hr>


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πŸ‘  , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , and 26 others
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vote details (90)
@elizacheng ·
Like the old Chinese saying... Failure is the Mother of Success...
We just need to think in another way... failure doesn't mean the end. It's just we found another way of not having it work. 
If Thomas Edison had quit, we wouldn't have the luxury of enjoying the light at night... :D
πŸ‘  
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@papanog ·
Failures will make you wiser, though bitter to swallow.
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@alvinauh ·
That's right @papanog but it gets easier to swallow over time..
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@r351574nc3 · (edited)
I cannot seem to find it, but I think there is also a Chinese saying that you need to die a thousand times before living. I think it was actually a quote about [Life and Death of Go](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Go_(game)#Life_and_death). The meaning is that you cannot expect to be immediately successful at Go (or anything) until you have learned to fail at it.
πŸ‘  
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vote details (1)
@alvinauh ·
That's right, but in that story, I think there is a lesson on marketing, the difference between edison and tesla. That would be a great analysis to do for a post.
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@elizacheng ·
Oh... I will be waiting for your next post on the analysis... Always interesting to read your posts... Since it's a spark from my comment, I get a % on your payout or not for that post??? LOL... hahaha...
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@erick23 ·
There is a problem of how to teach many people how to get up when you fail. Many have been convinced that you can't succeed in failure.

Discouragement are the biggest problem among us
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@alvinauh ·
That's very true, maybe one day, we will adapt the curriculum to take into account failure, but before that happens, it's all up to the teacher
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@allesia ·
We always have to trust in ourselves, to be motivated. Mistakes must make us stronger
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@alvinauh ·
They do, as long as we don't give up before the battle is over. Thanks for stopping by!
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@dxn · (edited)
My parents are always worried about my baby son when he walks around the house, worried he will stumble over and fall down.

I told them "If he don't fall, how is he gonna learn how to stand back up?".

It might sound callous, but if you don't let your kids learn how to get back on their feet, what are they gonna do when you are not around to protect them?
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@alvinauh ·
That's right, but is it their first grandson? My parents stopped worrying after my second child haha
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@dxn ·
Nope it's not their first grandson, but it's my first kid though so maybe they are more concerned about me not knowing how to look after him hahahaha!
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@papanog ·
I've come to know a person who are very dear to me, had use failures to propel him forward and become successful. His teacher was one of the main reason behind his success who never tired giving words of encouragement.
Thanks for sharing @alvinauh.
Cheers.
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@alvinauh ·
That's awesome, and that made him who he is today. My goal ultimately is just to help people see the good on teachers. Society aren't always positive of them unfortunately.
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@papanog ·
yeah..very unfortunate. 
But it does not discourage the teacher from giving good lesson to the child.
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@gvincentjosephm ·
Awesome!
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@creativo ·
Great post, definitely agree with the view that to be successful, one needs to continuing move in the right direction, there will be challenges and obstacles in the path to success.... so long as you keep "failing our way to success", we will make a big difference in the future.
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@alvinauh ·
Yes, and have a more sustainable success streak. If success comes easy, it normally does not last
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@creativo ·
Agreed. Good post. Thank you :)
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@r351574nc3 · (edited)
$0.02
Learning from failure is easy as long as we learn to make failure cheap.

![](https://steemitimages.com/DQmXhENUyt46TW5EWSJF6kwh7y7mEkxvZjw2H1AUfkb4nbs/image.png)
πŸ‘  
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vote details (1)
@alvinauh ·
$0.02
That's very true, you gave me an idea to do something on curiosity, thanks!
πŸ‘  
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@heartscally · (edited)
"You have to want it." This is 200% true. Similarly, no one ever thought that I would turn out to be a teacher today, even myself. What made me want to improve to be a better educator is by watching my own students persevere through difficult challenges and new frustrations, almost daily. Day in and day out, I am inspired by their grit and dedication. Thank you for sharing your story here! Gonna resteem this!
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@alvinauh ·
You're welcome, sometimes I think the people who make the most impact are those who are accustomed to failure, that's what make us tenacious and dedicated
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@heartscally ·
Right on!
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@chanelcalestus ·
True. The more we try, the mo we gain. Never Give up. 😊
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@fknmayhem ·
> Do or don’t, there is no try.
> ~ Yoda
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@calebleejl · (edited)
this has been an awesome read! oh my. I'm terrible at failing :( it's really a skill that needs to be learnt. be it in my studies - choosing not to prepare for an exam so I won't be disappointed, or composing music - not attempting at all so I won't compose a sucky son. something I need to learn and also intentionally create the environment for my own children to get used to failing, failing forward. :)
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@alvinauh ·
I just push forward, if I fail, I fail, at least I've tried. I'm sure your song sounds better than you think =)
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@calebleejl ·
thanks for the encouragement. hope it put some courage in me :)
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@fknmayhem ·
Excellent post. I wish more teachers, and program designers, would have studied Einstein who was one of the most vocal scientists about embracing failure and that knowledge doesn’t necessarily equate to ~~power~~ being able to think creatively.
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@alvinauh ·
Einstein and to some extent maybe even sun tzu. We should take into account the best minds of our time no matter their academic qualifications. Sometimes, program designers get really caught up with referencing only experts with strong academic credentials without taking into account those with experience.
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@thesteemengine ·
Congratulations! This post has been chosen as one of the daily Whistle Stops for The STEEM Engine!

<center>[![](https://ethandsmith.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/12/commentSTEEMengine.jpg)](https://steemit.com/@thesteemengine)</center>

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The STEEM Engine is an initiative dedicated to promoting meaningful engagement across Steemit. [Find out more about us and join us](https://steemit.com/introduceyourself/@thesteemengine/introducing-the-steem-engine-initiative) today!
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@spaceginger ·
Great post @alvinauh. I've failed many times in life, but I try to live by accepting life 'as is'. There is no such thing as a failure. There is no such thing as success. There just 'is'. I do try to accept when I create a painting that is not as great as I imagined and then put more effort and focus on the next one. Sometimes the next one still fails but it's all just learning and growing :)

Thanks for the great post and thanks to #SteemEngine for leading me here. I stumbled upon Steem Engine and really feels like my kind of group who are here to post and follow great content producers like yourself. Follow you now for sure :)
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@alvinauh ·
You're welcome, I'm glad that you enjoy it. I have students who think that hey are failures because they think that their work is not good enough.

I always tell them as long as they give it their all, it's not failing but learning. Hope to see you more often around the steem engine!
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@daodesam ·
I tell my students the same thing! You will never make the shot if you are afraid of missing. I think this was the most important theme of the new Star Wars movie especially in Luke Skywalker's case.
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@alvinauh ·
That's right, I noticed that the best students in star wars turn to the dark side. Anak in and kylo were great students and look what happened to them.. Then again.. It could be a family thing.
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@daodesam ·
True, you could say that the most talented students that never learn to deal with failure can't handle it when they inevitably face it.
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@jeejee ·
@alvinauh
Learning is definitely a life long journey. This is important to remember and to teach our children. Thanks for the inspiration πŸ‘
@jeejee
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