Childhood Stories #2 - Holding The Jehova's Witnesses Hostage by beggars

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· @beggars · (edited)
$2.32
Childhood Stories #2 - Holding The Jehova's Witnesses Hostage
This story I am about to share happened more than once, just in different circumstances. My dad is one of the most talkative people you will ever meet, he could talk underwater or beneath concrete, about everything and anything.

My father has a penchant for getting himself into weird and usually hilarious situations, mostly unintentionally. But as a result, I have a treasure trove of stories from growing up. If you missed my first story, give it a read because it involves my dad [bringing home some bees](https://steemit.com/life/@beggars/childhood-stories-1-the-time-my-dad-accidentally-brought-home-a-bee-s-nest) from the dump and being bitten by them.

People seemed to love the story about the bees and while this one doesn't involve bringing home bees, it still makes me laugh when I think about it or when it gets brought up at the dinner table or family event.

Occasionally you will get harmless door-knocking religious people coming to give you a brochure and talk about their religion, usually, it's the Jehova's Witnesses that are the ones who come door-to-door here in Australia. My family is not religious whatsoever, so we usually say we're not interested and that is that.

One day a couple of Jehova's Witnesses came to the door, it was about 6 pm. My mother was cooking dinner and we were all mostly in the lounge room, The Simpsons used to be on TV around this time of night, so we would be watching that.

A couple of Jehova's Witnesses knocked on the door and my father answered: big mistake. My mother would usually say we're not interested, but my dad instantly was roped in and it wasn't him I felt sorry for, it was the people who knocked on our door because they picked the wrong house to visit. Whatever plans these people might have had for their evening, might as well be cancelled, it's game over for them.

I remember it was a Sunday night because my mother would always make a roast lamb dinner for lunch without fail every Sunday. And let me tell you, her roast lamb was LEGENDARY. So much so, my friends used to always ask to sleep over on a Sunday just to have some of that delicious roast, my mouth is watering thinking about it.

She would not only cook the moistest and fall off the bone roast lamb you ever had, but she would cook these delicious golden baked potatoes where she would sprinkle flour over the top of them and cook them in a tray of butter and mixed herbs. 

If you haven't experience roast potatoes cooked in butter, you haven't lived life. And to top it all off, a delicious gravy and some vegetables, usually a cob of corn, broccoli and cauliflower.

![roast-581759_1920.jpg](https://steemitimages.com/DQmQdRkVniVoH3doMdfh1jyKsPYCx2Ag9vkTfUR6oAmAgXY/roast-581759_1920.jpg)

I cannot even honestly tell you what my father was speaking to these people about, I doubt it was about religion because he claims to not be religious, although I did catch him praying one night, he claims he was just "messing around".

My father was at the door for maybe half an hour or more talking to these people and then what he did next I remember because it's hilarious. My dad went into the kitchen and asked my mum if it was okay if the people could stay for dinner. Apparently one of them had remarked how good dinner smelt and my dad just instinctively invited them to dinner without even thinking.

Fortunately, my mother always made more than we could eat. Even though I am one of six children (I have five sisters), the fact eight of us were having dinner and we still had room for two more people goes to show you the scale of these roast dinners my mother prepares. Always overboard, it's like every Sunday is a Thanksgiving dinner.

My mother isn't a strict person, but she says what is on her mind and sometimes it can come across as cold or insensitive, but not meant that way at all. I confirmed with my dad what my mum said when I wrote this and she said when he asked her if they could stay for dinner, "I don't want to feed these fucking people, you don't even know who they are" - my dad remembers this situation well, he even laughed when I mentioned it.

My dad must have been pretty convincing because he went back to the door (they would have surely heard what my mother said) and he invited them in for dinner. I could tell it was a weird situation for them, they probably were used to having doors slammed on them, not being invited into some strangers house with six kids for dinner. They were very quiet, but polite and spoke to us like we knew them for years.

One thing about my dad people need to understand is that he loves to feed people. Growing up he would always offer food to my friends, usually insisting they try something he just made or eat something. And it's not a cultural thing either, my dad is about as Australian as you can imagine, lingo and all. 

My dad has always just been selfless like that, because growing up we weren't wealthy and at times we were very poor, still my dad would be willing to feed anyone who came over even if we didn't have much.

After dinner, they said they had to go and were appreciative of the meal that many of my friends would have committed serious crimes to get their hands on. They were in such a rush to leave they forgot to leave the religious booklets they love to hand out. I am sure they appreciated the gesture, but ultimately shocked at what had just happened and didn't know how to react.

Word must have got out because apparently for a few months thereafter Jehova's Witnesses visiting our house became a frequent occurrence. We didn't invite any more in for dinner, I think my mother made sure she dismissed anyone who came to do the door after that.
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vote details (31)
@honeysim ·
$0.03
The title alone had me cracking up....I am here thinking this should be interesting as normally it feels like it is the Jehovah's Witnesses who usually hold us hostage, lol. Your dad is something else but that was a really nice gesture. That is a hostage situation that I think many persons wouldnt mind based on your description of the roast. But then again, they would have to pay the cost of being "over-talked", lol. Good one mate.
👍  
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@beggars · (edited)
Haha, yes indeed. In a way it's a form of mild karma, they got fed, but my dad certainly took up a lot of their time that's for sure. He has a habit of doing this with a lot of people he meets. I should really share the story of the time someone came to the door selling paintings (you know those people), he was a backpacker from France trying to make a little money doing door-to-door canvas painting sales. My dad fed him as well, but it was chicken flavoured two-minute noodles. And my dad managed to get a bunch of free canvas picture samples, which they don't usually give out.
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@honeysim ·
Lolol....remind me not to come knocking at your dad's door if I have a meeting to get to. I like that he is the type of person who creates memories even with persons he is just meeting. He will have a lifetime of stories.
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@minnowsupport ·
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