![Screenshot_20190208-124241_1.jpg](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmXnPuHGSpLjbmBrp2Mg4awPhPoXngMS3Q66ZC9sGJExjt/Screenshot_20190208-124241_1.jpg)

Almost all of my major organs have a defect like for example my left eye is basically or should I say "legally blind". I can still see with it but its peripheral vision is distorted. Then of course my bones just gives me deformities like in my right hand, they all point to the left when I try to put my fingers together. That is why I have some trouble eating with my hands as I could not easily use them to eat rice.

Then this issue of weakness in my grip and overall body strength, it all had gone down the drain so now I am almost 100% just relying on others to do some things for me because I simply cannot anymore. Sadly it all falls to burden my aging parents so I am praying to God to give them more strength because I needed their immediate love, care, and support for me.

<center>![weak.gif](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmZGe5523Vk1aMRbSPdD9A8dLHqp7A2LkxDgNW9teV1PEp/weak.gif)</center>
[Source](https://media0.giphy.com/media/QoZunxgU0Z1i8/200w_d.webp)

Now I am having this bothersome ringing of my ear. It actually got worse in the course of years which maybe a complication of my bone issues because our ears have the smallest bone in the body so if that would be affected which I think is already happening then I might find myself deaf in the future. May God forbid that from happening because it will too much to bear already.

That is why I am religiously taking my parathyroid medication because at least I have a hope if not cure my bone condition is to slow its progression down. So I am also getting stricter about my diet, well I cannot eat that much anyway but my effort is till not fading away despite it is hard in the body and my well-being and expensive matter too manage.

If I were an automobile I could have been sold for scrap already but I am like our car, half-eaten by rust and modified inside by my father that made it ugly with no style but still running and running and running. Maybe it is because it is useful I don't know because I think I am just wasting oxygen with my prodigal existence.