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My strength had been dwindling right even before I had my first dialysis. In fact I never had been a strong person physically because my illness had been brewing ever since I was still a baby.
I also tried to gain some weight but I wasn't successful to do it especially after being a dialysis patient. I started to weight at 54 Kg then down to 52, 48, and finally to 36-37 Kilos. So now I am just a pile of skin and bones and have no strength sometimes to even open a snack or a bottle of drink.
So if you leave me with a closed bottle of drink and that is the only available thing to drink somewhere then I will just die in thirst, all because my hands and arms and body as a whole is just too weak to do that kind of simple task of opening a bottle by simply twisting its cap.
I really feel frustrated about my body's weakness. It has been consumed over the course of my lifetime until I had gotten to a point that I can't even function normally and is requiring the support of anybody around me.
I still wanted to be back with at least 75% of my usual strength but now it seems that I am weaker than a three year old child. I am sure that maybe I will get my strength back after a Kidney transplant. I am still also dreaming of that life-changing event to come and there is some possibility for it to happen because of cryptos.
I also remember my co-patient years back getting a Kidney transplant, she told me that it was like being born again after getting the Kidney transplant. I know what she means by that as all things will get normalized, the ability to sleep, eat normally, the strength comes back and you will be like a normal person to put it exactly.
The transplanted kidney by the way doesn't last forever. There will come a time that you will revert to dialysis but there will also be a possibility that you can get a transplant again. In my case I am still not sure if it is still feasible in my condition but maybe it will be if maybe God wills it for me.