<center>![Screenshot_20190427-190339_1.jpg](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmRNSZg6He129nKK2r5twktZP2ry1vjdbJ2YCNBt8wWgCr/Screenshot_20190427-190339_1.jpg)</center>
<center>__Nothing Much Left To Do__</center>

Bored as ef, that is what I will be if I do not have something to do at least to distract me from all these health troubles especially now that I have a very limited and prohibitive body movements. The cause of my body's limitations is my being a long-term dialysis patient with a long-term imbalance of phosphorus and calcium in my system that had lead me into developing Leontiasis which I now am trying to control with a difficult to take and expensive medication.

But all my medical therapy regarding my bone management it seems came too little too late because changes already happened and now it is really hard to change it. Well it will never get reverted back into its original state regarding my appearance and stature but with the time that I took my Cinacalcet for my Secondary hyperparathyroid the enlarged bones had receded a bit and also the pains that are lingering in my back got alleviated.

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<center>__It Is Hard To Accept The Fact That I Am Immobile Now__</center>

But my other joints like my feet joints in particular just progressed and now it is just impossible to walk. I am just fully dependent on wheelchair to let me go from one point to another and still I am uncomfortable about it because sitting around really is painful to the back so I just can't hang around sitting for long and now I just prefer to lay down even when I wanted to eat because swallowing is hard when eating  when sitted.

I am just so careful when I walk around in the bathroom because I believe that my hip joint are also weak, in fact they are hurting a bit and stiff right now like any other joints in my body. I can't imagine if my hip would deteriorate because it will be very difficult for my parents to take care of me and surely for me tenfold as well. I rather just die than to cause my lovedones some further hard times.

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<center>__Being Handicapped Is Something But With Pain Factor Is Another Whole New Thing__</center>

Now being immobile is really a punishment especially for me that have a back and rib pains so it is not really even comfortable to lay down on my back or to lay on my side. Not mentioning my marked weakness in my whole body in general from the tips of my hands to the tips of my feet for the reason that I have no clue of.

It is also hard to look down as my head not only grew big but my neck also receded so much down that it is hard to also swallow. I cannot look down because my chin is now already in-front of my chest. So any work regarding that I have to look down in order to see what I am doing is not good anymore to do.

<center>![human-skeleton-163715_640.jpg](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmR2XyZzPzieoeWWE5W4nd4gmTpU2tF52nWt9XeGucnCAB/human-skeleton-163715_640.jpg)</center>
<center>__Almost All My Body Parts And Major Organs Are faulty, Even My Brain Too__</center>

Now all I can do is just to go online and thanks to my sister who was able to subscribe into a lined Internet connection to which now I am connected to their modem. I just contribute to the monthly bill that we have to pay and it is a win-win situation for both of us that way plus my father also has a source of entertainment  because of that after my Niece handed over her old smartphone to my Father.

 As for myself I just use the Internet to earn a bit of money that I am using for my immediate and God-willing future medical needs. Of course there is always play and not all work, so when I have seen some movie that I could download I will take it and watch it later, I also stream my favorite tracks from YouTube and it is just funny that I just listen to the same songs over and over at will.

I do not play games now because it is I think hard to play a game while lying down because of the awkward position and pain in my body. So I just prefer to watch movies, stream music, and write blogs. They are now my form of entertainment, I do not even watch the television nowadays for that matter and so I just thank God for these technologies that truly have benefited my life in  the most positive ways.


<center>![beverage-3157395_640.jpg](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmPfpo7cxV3QS2nxfjqQe6XoGtNWhCLVPuL24c3z2u28FY/beverage-3157395_640.jpg)</center>
<center>__The Internet Now Is My Source Of Entertainment And The Outlet Of My Frustrations In Life__</center>

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