Why do we hide? Why?? I Mean Really, WHY??? Why do we keep secrets when simply telling someone can be Sooo liberating! I understand why some people can't tell; Murder, Politics or Who knows. My secret is...
Well... Ok fine, I'll tell you but you can't tell anyone. My secret its... it's simple really... Well, I guess it's more of a thing... I guess, it, it's... Embarrassment. YES, that's it! A feeling. Kinda... but no... No. Not really... OK, I'll tell you, but it's more complicated than I imagined and not unique to my situation at all. Many others, are having the same issues with the mask. Why is hiding so easy???
It's easy because we think we can, so we think, say, feel or express exactly what's on our minds with no repercussions. Isn't that how it should be? Sounds simple enough. Right? But it's not really easy at all, this mask is a huge burden on us all and its wasting a ton of our physical and creative energy. Why is the peeling back of this mask so terrifying???
Hey, Like... Look. Ahh ha, You're wearing a mask too!!! I didn't know this was going to be a costume party, it's getting crowded. Friends? Family? Do they ALL really matter? They probably should matter... but why??? Oh, no no dear, shh, shhh, you weren't supposed to have tried to answer my question. Besides the answer sucks ass anyway, but it is true and I'll tell you later.
All of you pondering my questions, STOP... Stop, stop it now. The questions I ask while talking with you are mostly meant to be rhetorical but maybe we can cut into him later and figure it out together. You're probably right though and we'll just leave it at that for now... No, It's not that I don't want to hear more of what you have to say, sweetie. I don't mean to be rude but I've completely run out of my Telepathy Tokens for this month on the blockchain and I'm really just wanting to put into your mind, "Why I feel I can't ever take off my mask?"
Why must I keep it on? I know it is my choice too. I mean, I could take it off. We're all adults here, aren't we? Except for you honey, your not supposed to be here but I'm proud you are. It shows initiative. Careful or you'll be pregnant by 20, with your second. I'm serious, What would happen if I ripped it all off? Ya, ya, Ha Ha, I'd be naked... he said. You'd like me. *wink* He'd like me too. She looks like she'd like me as well.*wink* *wink*Oh, and that one would love me too. Hell, You might even start feeling erotic and loan me to a friend. I know I am. Sooo many lonely people in this world and I'm horny way too often by myself. I'm glad I've got you to ramble too.
I can't believe I've actually started opening up to you already. Yes, you. Just earlier we hardly knew each other but I can tell, you now want to see my secret. My Special... or is it My Precious? Sometimes people, places and things just click together and suddenly it just feels right. Like me in your hands, no??? I'm really glad you found me, well get along as long as you never put me down. Wink, wink. Ohhh My G, so far off subject. ohhhh, why stop now... Why can I never let the world see the real me? Cause if they did, if they did really see me... my world would crumble to pieces... I have to stay strong for the world, for you.
Staying strong all the time is such a burden! I mean FUCK, I'm doing what I love to do... but unhappy doing it... because I'm unable to share it with family??? What the Fuck do I care what my family thinks! Wait, shh shhh sh, I think I'm getting somewhere maybe... Maybe I'm wearing the mask to save them from their embarrassment... Steering back closer to on the topic. Still, following??? Well, it really doesn't matter anyway... Just listen. You all DO know how the hierarchy of friends works, Right??? Good... Ok... Fine... Fine, fine, OK, damn, try not to get lost, I'm going to go through this quickly... Just so everyone present is on the same page. Gather round, read on, grab your thoughts, a glass of wine, a cracker or piece of cheese and add more bubbles. Go ahead yell out for it and demand they bring it to you right now! You deserve it. Oh, Shut Up, don't spoil it for those alone. Just imagine being served and yell out!
Well did they bring you cheese or a glass of wine? No, those lil brats. I didn't get anything either. No ones home so I had to get my ass up and get my own damn wine. What page are you on? I'm on the one where I had to get my own wine. You didn't get any either? No. How bout you? Oh, you did. You're so lucky! I guess the page we're all actually on depends on what age is at the bottom, right? Oh, look my shoe says too young. My IQ says way too old. My wine says, oh fuck me, just right! Who would have thought I'd ever randomly grab my birth year from all those bottles in the cellar; I never said I wasn't spoiled, and all while in the dark too, birth year, woohoo? It must be my lucky day! I met you... and you are still here paying attention, wow, it really IS my lucky day. Which can only mean one thing... it's your lucky day too! No, I'm not telling you why just yet. Mmm... Mmmmm... my birth year is DeLish! In beer terms your only two soldiers down on me... Tonight this is going to be a much-loved battle... Go ahead take a sip or a swig and catch up, I'll wait.
There that's better, isn't it? This is stuff your probably not supposed to read sober anyway. Lucky day! Today's my Birthday. No, I'm NOT telling you what year. I will eventually, just not yet. You can try to figure it out while we sit awhile... I know... I saw you right over there... eyeing me from afar, well I actually I thought you were looking at the soft colorful harlot lying next to me. Then to my shock, you wandered over... and you were checking me out. Yes, you were... And when you reached down to pick me up YOU almost dropped ME. I was so hot at that moment. I wouldn't have blamed you if you did drop me. But you didn't, you caught me. Caught me in your fingertips... And then you get fresh, and way too quickly I might add, I didn't even know your name. Fresh. Yes, you did.
Well, what do you call it then? Oh yes, I think you did... So, right after you dropped me... YES YOU DID drop me... OK, fine will use your description instead. Right after you... Can;t believe I'm saying this... Right after you 'SWEPT ME OFF MY FEET', dropped me, *ahem* you proceeded to slowly run your finger down my spine, forcing my pages to swell on end. Then to my excitement, you flipped me over, I could feel your cold hands pressed into me while your fingers quickly worked my back cover, stealing my innermost thoughts... It was an intensely erotic experience. I prayed you'd tear into me forcing me to divulge all my knowledge to you right then and there, I mean here. NO. Like right here, this very spot. But then you just stuffed me in a plastic sack and tossed me over your shoulder into the cold back seat of your car for a week. That was my recollection of our first meet. My O' my, you really do have a naughty mind.
I think we all have dirty minds. Some of us suppress the dirt. Some of us hide from it. Some of us speak against it. Some of us have fun while we wrestle it. Some of us live in it. Some of us play in it. Some of us, like me, want to bask in it, embracing it, the dirty seeping into every fiber of my being! Oh so now ive got you attention again, hold on. Just try to behave yourself. The nights have begun to get cooler, will you be the one keeping me warm? It is a nice fireplace.
So pretty... the way the fire flickers... flickers in the dim light... or is it... Heh Heh, Heh Heh, Fires Cool! Oops. Shit, practally just gave away my age. Would you be so kind and pour me another. Ohhhoh, Thank youuuu! Ahhh, Oooo, burr someone's hands are cold. Ahem... N--E--Waaay, back to the point, no not my main point. The side point. I know I'm a lot like a grayhound bunny in heat but I think you can follow along. It's my turn so just sit back and take it alllll in. Let's see, Ummm... let us use the hierarchy of your old high school: A four to five tier system to explain it further. by blah, blah, blah; ah... Oh hey! Love ya, forgive me, kids! I gotta run! Be back soon!!!
A Note from the Author:
I don't know when or if this book will ever end up a new york times bestseller or screenplay somewhere or if it will ever even come to fruition at all. But the hardest part is done! I've started. Peace & Love my friends from the bottom of my heart, I hope you enjoyed this first chapter of -=Hiding Behind The Mask=-
-= A book made for steemit = Chapter 1 = A Secret = Hiding Behind The Mask by Dogflea Vegas =-