In my life there have been a lot of times where girls have thought I was trying to sleep with them and given me the pre-ask rejection.

No, I'm not trying to sleep with you. Yeah, I maybe think you're cute, or like this or that about you, and maybe I'm especially nice because of that. Or maybe I'm just being myself. Maybe I just suck in my own way at communication and I'm not actively trying to manipulate you. Maybe that's actually the reason why I got rejected. Whatever.

Humans are weird. Everything needs to work out just right for things to work out. There's this delicate mating dance we do. And you know what, not all of us know the steps. And not all of us are doing the same dance. Some of us are just moving to the music. Some of us aren't particularly trying to stick our penis in you, just because we have one.

But I'm not gonna tell you that you're an idiot every time you make a fool of yourself. I'm just going to get your number and then never call you, despite kinda liking you a bit, because I can't be asked and I'm gonna die alone anyway.

We all live in this weird weird world with these weird rules about what you can and can't say that mean that basically every relationship is just a test of your manipulation skills. Can you say everything right to stay in it and keep banging? Ehh. And we're supposed to be looking for our perfect love in this world? How the fuck is that supposed to happen when no one's being themselves?

And yet here I am the idiot that just wants to be himself. I don't have the patience...or...no...it's just too fucking annoying to basically manipulate people.

And I'm kinda okay with that.

Okay, so sometimes my penis is talking and I kinda do wanna sleep with a girl...but we're all just animals.

And for some reason, despite feeling like I'm not that good looking because of years of abuse by kids in school and being overweight, I actually don't do that bad when it comes to having fun out. Various girls at different times have liked me. You know, before I mess it up. But that happens when you're being yourself and yourself is just another crazy baboon that evolved to walk upright.

But, even if I've mostly given up on the whole idea of finding Mrs. Right, I might actually have more of a chance than most people, because I'm not trying to manipulate people just to get in their pants...no matter what they might think...which is really unfortunate, because the few times I've had to manipulate someone for whatever reason, I was pretty good at it. I feel like I could probably do it as a job. I considered being a lawyer, but you know, ehh, didn't wanna get up in front of a court.

Maybe don't assume everyone's just trying to sleep with you. It's probably only like 99.997%.

And if you are one of those people that acts a certain way to get in a relationship or to get laid, consider being a bit more of yourself. It's actually not really that hard. You don't really have to make up some shit. If you do, you kinda suck at it. I'm just gonna assume you suck at it if you're lying.

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Accurate representation of a standard girl's inbox.
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