## Well this is my first post on HIVE and honestly I am all trying to figure this all out. Maybe that will be something for another post somewhere soon. But yeah, I have been absent, that is true. There was hardly any response from me, and I haven't hardly even touched my computer in general for the last month. The reason of all reasons...COVID-19 ..as this is the reason for everything happening these days.
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![20200316_133616.jpg](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmRgvdnbkFjtezHmzSw1vtFiokz6azEkXwvgKZVBuKrSBv/20200316_133616.jpg)
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### Yeah that's me from my normal working days, without this crap. So normally I am a scrubnurse in surgery but these days I am lended out to the ICU for supporting tasks in their normal days. In normal days we have 24 ICU beds, in COVID days we have the 29 COVID ICU beds, and about 10 'normal' sick ICU patients. (people who had emergency surgery, had an accident, or whatever else that will get you in the ICU except for COVID)
### Now I will not be writing about how we should all stay inside and social distance, we know that drill already. I also will not be writing about if it is scary or rough to work on an infectious disease department, because we can all read the stories of other who have already written that a lot better.
### The bottom line is....it sucks. Not in a way when I am working. I am used to working in a lot of weird measures, when we treat other patients with say as an example MRSA, VRE or TBC we are also wrapped in like burritos. So a day goes by as a normal day, except for that all I work with are COVID patients. It bugs me when I am at home. It bugs me when I think that when I break a sweat that I immediately stick a thermometer in my mouth, which would normally not be the deal (I didnt even own a thermometer). It bugs me that I have colleagues who are admitted with the same disease and who I work with (no social distancing when you treat patients on ICU kids), and it bugs me that I know that my loved ones are worried for me.
### But what I also notice is how mentally consuming that this is. I mean this in a way that I can read newspapers and not remember anything I read. I make jigsaw puzzels in my free time to clear the head, and I like it hahahaha. I cook like a master chef these days, because food is the fun that these days give. And there is where the difference is when looking at others....

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https://steemitimages.com/DQmehTDgLpQghT7ZWRnfYZAgK4VkGKZXgQUH476xivXaiZf/circles.png
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### I just got a message from the most lovely @hashcash about how life is. And reality is...apart from that I work in a weird department, Hollands 'intelligent' lockdown is not really bad. If you compare the situation here to say India, South Africa or a random island in the Caribbean, everybody who complanes in Holland should really take a quick check in the mirror (or start blogging...who knows what it will bring)
### And there it is indeed. My first post on HIVE, and on Steem as well.... Because that is the whole part that kind of flew right by me when all of this madness started (it started a lot earlier in my working spot that it did compared for the most around me). I missed how the whole situation is now. And reality is, and let me say this very silent *it is not important...pssssssssst*

### Because yes...I know this is a lot of peoples livelyhood and work. And yes, I know and believe blockchains still will change te world. But when you are working on a infectious disease department carrying bodies away everyday, it does kind of feel irrelevant. But hey...I am writing and reading this anyways...so uhhhhh.. I still care. But I miss info and a lot of it and the will to search it is not really there at the moment. That's a matter of time I guess and hope.

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![image.png](https://images.hive.blog/DQmTyjK9KvSpzJ99kRsRZYXsiGx4PJjoGA3CsJT8W1BqPBE/image.png)

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### Some little birdy whispered that the halving of a major big coin is coming up ;). At the same time government are making the most epic capital debts in the history of time and printing more money like there is no tomorrow. Will this be the grande breakthough around crypto? Let's see how this works and in the mean time....stay the f&ck safe!!