There is no point in loving people if you do not understand them by krisii

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· @krisii ·
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There is no point in loving people if you do not understand them
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As a priority in every love affair is the attempt to make the person with you happy. But if you are one of the people whose relationships fail, and regardless of your efforts, you mostly encounter communication gaps, then perhaps you sincerely love your partner, but you do not understand it. Why is this happening?

You may have a great desire to show your love to the person next to you or to your friends, but if you do not understand and realize the methods they will feel loved, your efforts will be invaluable and will even provoke great problems.

Awareness is a process of the mental, physical and emotional level. And like any process, it takes time before you decide whether you love or dislike someone. But most people do not. Most people follow their instincts. They bind themselves, following their subconscious, simply because in a company they feel good and cozy or because they experience the inexplicable attraction.

As a result, they are confronted with the same problems in relationships starting most often from their childhood. Then they wonder what went wrong, as long as they did not know the people around them to know what to do. They were afraid to share their needs and expected to love each other unconditionally. The feelings are obvious, but the thought is gone.

Imagine such a relationship as a child who sees an aquarium with fish, and one of the fish attracts him more strongly than the others. She decides to show her love for her, so she takes her out of the aquarium, gives her some of her chocolate desserts, turns her into a blanket and cuddles her, but finally, the fish dies.

She is not a man like a child, and although she would feel loved by these gestures she does not need them, they kill her. If the child knew the fish would die, he would not have taken it out of the aquarium. So the partner - if he knows what hurts you, he probably will not. And if he hurts you purposefully, where is your mind to be with this man.

It does not sound particularly romantic, but the only way to be happily tied up is by setting one's criteria for communication, for romance, luckily. The earlier, the better, the more crises we will save.

With the lack of requirements, you tell people around you that you do not need attention, you need no love or respect, but you are ready to give them unconditionally. Your actions read: "I do not want to do anything but to brighten my day with my presence." Even if the other thinks with a corner of his brain that maybe you are a man and you have a desire to meet the behavior of "ready to give more than to get", he will take advantage.

But at one point the glass will overflow, and you will have to put some criteria that were important to you from the beginning, but you were afraid to express it aloud. Then people will be shocked that you have any need. Because they have believed that this pace of your relationship can last forever, it likes them, and they will hardly endeavor to bring you back to it.

There is no such thing as unconditional love unless it is a relationship between mother and child (and there are cases where this love is conditional). With stable connections, there are conditions, compromises with them and changes. Do not think that you are a stone that will fall somewhere, and the whole environment will be transformed to make life easier.

Partnerships exist because of equality and reciprocity, which are harmonious only in the understanding of the partner, only if we know his needs, his past and the relationship between them. By understanding what we see, we hear and feel. By honesty about our personal shortcomings and needs. Not by playing to guess what I am, but by finding meaning in every reaction and problem.

Relationships with people are like a science that requires diligent learning, but thanks to it you will be getting better in searching for information and arranging it as if you were a puzzle. And in the minute, when you clearly arrange the character of a person, you will be able to understand and love him so that he feels loved.

### Much love - Krisii

photo source - https://pixabay.com
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vote details (87)
@prudence ·
So true.
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@machhour ·
<i>Is it necessary to understand the other to love him, and I would even say, to understand oneself in order to love one another? To want to understand part of the mind which seeks explanations, justifications and even pretexts to advance towards the best in itself and to make it live around oneself. Let us dare to ask ourselves the real questions: those which will allow us once again to come closer to what we are of More Beautiful and Greater!</i>
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