Biscuit by meesterboom

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· @meesterboom ·
$19.89
Biscuit
![_IMG_000000_000000.jpg](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQme939J2NFwYPi7RQuW4uwnGMs7sntJegy6wmLvMUaJ5AY/_IMG_000000_000000.jpg)

*Hmm.*

I cast my eye over the shelves in the Beer shop and came to a rather unpleasant realisation. 

There were none I wanted to buy.

This was a tad awkward. I could feel the bearded pestilence of the *Bear-Man* behind me as his gaze drilled into my back. 

No doubt he was wondering why I wasn't clutching at a gaggle of bottles and bringing them up to his counter so he could weigh them against my soul and charge me the difference.

![IMG_20190629_172937943_20190701202903971_20190705164725630.jpg](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmQeBGAZhvohDC2VH9e6HqYgVW73StezuvUu5N9xYJ6mCp/IMG_20190629_172937943_20190701202903971_20190705164725630.jpg)

I felt his massive frame shift behind the counter. 

No doubt he was terribly ashamed that he had let me down. Rightly so.

I turned to face him. 

*There is nothing new?*

I half asked, half stated, giving him the benefit of the doubt that his shop and shop-keeping skills had not suddenly become shite.

The *Bear-Man* didn't look very contrite. In fact, he seemed amused. His grin sparkled out from the gaps in his otter-like beard.

*Oh aye there is.*

He grunted like a pelican digging up a half-opened can of corned beef.

*Really? I can't see anything I haven't tried.*

The *Bear-Man* grinned even wider.

*Late delivery. Still out the back. Need a hand getting the load in the back door.*

![IMG_20190629_172937943_20190701202903971_20190705164928217.jpg](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmbeFWdv2ioZ8GJEYJ7Ro69EEAioUsACWyKdeBgqnwttCn/IMG_20190629_172937943_20190701202903971_20190705164928217.jpg)

I looked at him in some consternation. It seemed that every time I thought the *Bear-Man* was not planning to *futter* me up the back-bin, he would say something about back entrances and loads with a strange gleam in his eye.

*You want a hand, is that it?*

I said with one eye narrowed like a Pirate playing darts.

*Aye, that'd be lovely.*

He grunted again with the mad face.

*What's in it for me?*

I said with a cheery tilt of the head, hoping that the answer would involve free or discounted beer and not a sound beating from a rogue penis.

![IMG_20190629_172937943_20190701202903971_20190705165112577.jpg](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmehy5GHLpDveTRPtFL3TUUk3dqSmzS2YENU73qqskxzWP/IMG_20190629_172937943_20190701202903971_20190705165112577.jpg)

The *Bear-Man* laughed and stepped out from behind the counter. 

*I will give you a bloody biscuit!! HA!*

A fucking biscuit? Was he mental? Did I look like a patsy? Oh well, it was nice to be nice I suppose. 

I sighed and followed him out the back to help him lug a few boxes in.

Once we were done, he went to one of the boxes and opened it. 

*Chocolate Wafer do you?*

I rolled my eyes slightly. 

*Yeah, go on.*

The *Bear-Man* passed me a shiny black can of beer. 

I looked down at it with genuinely surprised pleasure, it was a Chocolate Wafer beer and it looked magnificent.

*You didn't really think I would give you a biscuit did ya?*

The *Bear-Man* chortled massively. 

*Of course not!*

I lied magnificently, tucking the bottle away in my bag. 

Saturday is looking up!
πŸ‘  , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , and 150 others
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vote details (214)
@gikitiki ·
$0.03
<center>
<em>GLORIOUS BEER</em>
 
 <p>

Now I won't sing of sherbet and water
For sherbet and beer will not rhyme
The workingman can't afford champagne
It's a bit more than two D's a time
So I'll sing you a song of a gargle
A gargle that I love so dear
I allude to that grand institution
That beautiful tonic called beer, beer, beer.
<p>
<em>Chorus</em>
 
Beer, Beer, glorious beer
Fill yourselves right up to here
Drink a good deal of it; make a good meal of it
Stick to your old fashioned beer
Don't be afraid of it, drink till you're made of it
Now all together, a cheer
Up with the sale of it, down with a pail of it
Glorious, glorious beer.

<p>

It's the daddy of all lubricators
The best thing there is for the neck
Can be used as a gargle or lotion
By persons of every sect
Now we know who the goddess of wine was
But was there a goddess of beer?
If so, let us drink to her health, boys
And wish that we'd just got her here, here, here.
<p>
<em>Chorus</em>:

So up, up with the brandies and sodas
But down, down and down with the beer
It's good for you when you are hungry
You can eat it without any fear
So mop up the beer while you're able
Of four-half lets all have our fill
And I know you'll all join me in wishing
Good luck to my dear Uncle Bill, Bill, Bill.
<p>
<em>Chorus</em>:
 

 
Written and composed by Steve Leggett & Will J. Godwin - 1895
Performed by Harry Anderson 1857-1918)
Performed by Harry Freeman (1858-1922)
</center>



[Source](https://monologues.co.uk/musichall/Songs-G/Glorious-Beer.htm)
πŸ‘  
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vote details (1)
@meesterboom ·
Raar!!!! My kinda song!!!
πŸ‘  
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@gikitiki ·
You should practice for Saturdays event!!!

I'm sure it'll sound fantastic in a Glaswegian accent
πŸ‘  
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vote details (1)
@anneke · (edited)
$0.03
I can just hear this song and drunk men going together haha
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kvbGADKa_Gg
πŸ‘  
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vote details (1)
@tamaralovelace ·
$0.04
Hey that sounds pretty good actually.   It's to be 95 degrees here with a heat index of 105 and I just finished mowing  the grass.    It's only just noon, though....is that too early??? LOL
πŸ‘  
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vote details (1)
@meesterboom ·
It's never too early! Oh wait, yeah before noon is too early but after.... Anything is game!!!
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@jlufer ·
@meesterboom hello dear friend.
Many times the kindness has benefits, thanks that helped get a beer that had not tasted. I hope you got a discount for having helped
I wish you a wonderful night
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@meesterboom ·
One can never scoff at a free beer! Cheers jlufer!
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@daltono ·
I don’t know how I am just finding your page, you’re a funny ass dude. 
Just gave you a follow my friend.
πŸ‘  
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vote details (1)
@meesterboom ·
Ha, smashing! Cheers man, likewise!
πŸ‘  
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vote details (1)
@steem-ua ·
#### Hi @meesterboom!

Your post was upvoted by @steem-ua, new Steem dApp, using UserAuthority for algorithmic post curation!
Your **UA** account score is currently 6.228 which ranks you at **#265** across all Steem accounts.
Your rank has dropped 1 places in the last three days (old rank 264).

In our last Algorithmic Curation Round, consisting of 175 contributions, your post is ranked at **#22**.
##### Evaluation of your UA score:

* You've built up a nice network.
* The readers appreciate your great work!
* Good user engagement!


**Feel free to join our [@steem-ua Discord server](https://discord.gg/KpBNYGz)**
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@anneke ·
$0.03
Ooooooh chocolate and cookies and nice things.....
![](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmVNQv4GG5Wt17h11YSufDbUXvbpui4KiMa5xteTJrPyyQ/image.png)
πŸ‘  
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@meesterboom ·
Heh heh, all of the nice things in a beer. I only hope it is actually good!
πŸ‘  
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@partiko ·
Thank you so much for participating in the Partiko Delegation Plan Round 1! We really appreciate your support! As part of the delegation benefits, we just gave you a 3.00% upvote! Together, let’s change the world!
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@ocdb ·
re-meesterboom-biscuit-20190706t233242019z
You got a 12.54% upvote from @ocdb courtesy of @meesterboom!  :)

@ocdb is a non-profit bidbot for whitelisted Steemians, current max bid is 15 SBD and the equivalent amount in STEEM.
Check our website https://thegoodwhales.io/ for the whitelist, queue and delegation info. Join our [Discord channel for more information.](https://discord.gg/k2Hu77b)


If you like what @ocd does, consider voting for [ocd-witness through SteemConnect](steemconnect.com/sign/account-witness-vote?witness=ocd-witness&approve=1) or on the [Steemit Witnesses page.](https://steemit.com/~witnesses) :)
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@janton · (edited)
lol! I like that quirky guy!
And dang, that artwork is amazing, I have no idea how you do that!
πŸ‘  
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vote details (1)
@meesterboom ·
Hehe, I liked that one too. Stretching my phone editing to is limits!
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@janton ·
lol. It's amazing, I'm tellin ya, there should be an award for daily artwork, original artwork on posts sir meesterboom, no one does that like you do!
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last_update2019-07-09 17:32:30
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children2
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last_payout2019-07-16 17:32:30
cashout_time1969-12-31 23:59:59
total_payout_value0.000 SBD
curator_payout_value0.000 SBD
pending_payout_value0.000 SBD
promoted0.000 SBD
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author_reputation129,817,527,504,984
root_titleBiscuit
beneficiaries
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accountesteemapp
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percent_steem_dollars10,000