Hello, 

it has been 16 days since I last posted, a lot has changed in my life, INCLUDING bringing a brand new BEAUTIFUL baby girl into this lovely world of ours. I thought I would take the time to share my birth story, my "pregnancy" story was not fun, personally, pregnancy was extremely hard for me... emotionally and physically! so with my birth story it was equally the same level of emotions,  but at least this time it came with a little bit (a lot a bit) of greatness in giving me the best thing me and my partner could ever dream of!

...so here I GO! 

![DSC_0375.jpg](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmVKmedNcRBzGzRB6sMkY9TZE5bPy7QryQo7UKkp6GM26T/DSC_0375.jpg)

At about 9PM on the 23rd of February, 2019 the hospital called me in from the induction list (I am 41 weeks and 4 days over due, so they had to put me on an induction list) after a LOT of nervousness that went THRU my body telling me "this is it, THIS IS IT!!!" we got to the hospital at about 10:30 PM. They checked me out, and I was still only 1CM dialated, they used a prostaglandin gel that was vaginally inserted that thins out the cervix to get labor rolling. After this quick procedure was completed, they sent us back home to "wait"...  we got back home at about 1:00AM (now the 24th of February) … although I COULD not, WOULD not sleep... at 2:00 AM I started having my contractions. They started at 1 minute long and about 1-2 minutes apart... which if you are reading this, and you have gone thru this before, at this point you should be AT THE hospital... normally contractions start 5-10 minutes apart and aren't normally consecutive. MINE WERE! I tracked them for a good hour, and they never changed. I attempted to have a bath, to see if they calmed down a bit, and they 100% did NOT. 

I then woke up my partner (David) and told him I needed to go back to the hospital cause I couldn't bare it anymore. We went back to the hospital at 4:00AM, they once again, checked me out (which in pure honesty, a vaginal/cervix check/exam is the most painful thing ever!) I was STILL only 1CM dialated. :( huge. sad. face. ever. 

Instead of sending us back home, at this point they decided to send us for a walk around the hospital, FOR 2.5 HOURS, telling us to return at 6:30AM. We did so, all while DYING and having extreme contractions that just wont subside, and had me bellowing over in pain. I attempted to start trying different breathing techniques, but my body failed to respond to them the way I was hoping. At one point where we were walking there was a constant beeping and I tried to step to the beep in a consecutive pattern and breath accordingly to, which seemed to work, in my head... but eventually that stopped working for me. After our 2.5 hour walk in the middle of the night in the quiet, creepiness of the hospital, I went back to get checked out again, I am now only 1-2CM dialated! again, sad face :(

here in Canada you do get your own labor room, although, it was not ready for me, therefor they had me in a very small room, with only a curtain, a bed and a sink... for the next 3 ish hours. The nurses provided me with a birthing ball, that seemed to helped sometimes, my contractions were really bad, and the duration and pain of them was not changing, this was starting to mentally mess with me, I was thinking I was somewhat of a failure because I couldn't deal with the pain and so many women for THOUSANDS of years have done this before me and I just felt low, this is when I realized I needed to get an epidural. I did not want to get a Epidural, I did not want to use any sort of drugs, this was my mindset throughout my entire pregnancy. Not that I felt they were wrong, or harming my baby, I just really wanted to experience as much as this moment as possible and not feel like I needed that sort of help. I was offered Fentanyl and Morphine and Laughing Gas, I DO NOT like the feeling of being "mind altered" it just wasn't my idea of a fun time, it scared me and it was something that I WOULD not condone to...

At about 9:30AM, I FINALLY got my own room! Comfy bed, BIGGER, private room, lounge chair for David, couple other chairs for other people to visit me, my own bathroom. I started getting constant attention from several AMAZING Nurses who monitored me and my body, baby and contractions. It was truly "Bliss" At 10:00 AM the lady for the epidural procedure came in and prepped me on the pros and cons, the complications and percentages of what could or couldn't happen, basically scaring me hahaha! if you have been through an epidural procedure before, you know you can not move as they are inserting the needle into your spine... when you are having contractions every 2 minutes, this is difficult... unfortunately she had to give me a small small small dose of Fentanyl to calm me down, it instantly hit me, went to my head and I started to freak out, David assured me everything would be okay. The epidural was a complete life changer, I will never not get one again if I every get pregnant again, and I suggest, HIGHLY suggest getting one if you are not against them! it helped me out so much and this was my decision, my body and I wasn't unhappy with my decision afterward. At one point I was feeling... NOTHING, I asked the nurse if I was having contractions? if anything was happening? and she let me know that I was still having contractions almost every 3-5 minutes apart... I FELT NOTHING! 

I FOUND WONDERLAND!


I continued to be checked for Dialation and at about 2-3:00 PM I was now 4CM dialated. Within ONE hour I jumped to 9MC!!!!!!! all of this took 14 hours of labor, 8 without the epidural and I hated every minute of it <3 ...even though the outcome was amazing! ALSO, the epidural eventually stopped working by the time I had to start pushing soooooooo, I felt everything regardless. 

Now for Delivery, I really had to pee, your legs go numb when you have an epidural, therefore if you cannot stand and bend your knees even a little bit, they instantly have to put a catheter in you, and this was a huuuuuge NO NO for me! so I was able to stand, David and the wonderful nurse guided me to the bathroom and I sat there for 10 minutes, and nothing would come out, they assured me that they needed to use the catheter because I cannot give birth when I need to pee, FYI, my water has not broke yet, and I am 9CM dialated, sitting on that toilet trying to pee, the urge of wanting to POOP was here, and they quickly brought me back to the bed so I can start pushing... wait, what about that pee?!!! well, she said there was another procedure they could do which was like a small plastic tube they insert manually and it drains my pee... she assured me it wasn't a catheter so I agreed to it, as David is laughing because it basically was a catheter the nurse knew I was afraid of it so she just called it something different basically. There were no doctors in the room at the time, and I am now in pushing position AND PUSHING, with no Doctors... My doctor left the hospital and was told to be called when I was ready, she wasn't far (the hospital was quiet with delivery's this day) so the nurse is calling and she's now on her way, but I'm actively pushing, (at one point it just felt like a basketball half in me half out of me and I screamed for a C-Section) I am not saying the nurses are "uneducated" but if there was something to happen, it's nice to you know, have a Doctor present... also, pretty sure the nurse cannot physically deliver the baby, I could be wrong. They called a different doctor who eventually showed up, and after he showed up, I felt 100% better, and he was extremely helpful, he talked me through everything that was going on and basically helped guide my baby out... 30 minutes of pushing and seconds later, I had a beautiful baby girl laying on my chest, BREATHING... A HUMAN BEING THAT ME AND MY PARTNER MADE! 

![DSC_0370.jpg](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmYGhFtJyW2hL7pXfuTo6FidicaTfnZ13NDW9oG8q6cBUq/DSC_0370.jpg)

...Also, Side note, is it just me or is every person who becomes a parent think their child is the cutest child in the world? when I previously thought/think a lot of babies aren't, they look like little wrinkled loafs of bread... but we instantly thought she was the cutest damn baby EVER!... leave some love below in the comments if you felt the same way when you 1st saw your new bundle of joy!


My actual doctor... finally showed up, and I started having mild-medium Hemorrhaging and started to loose a lot of blood, I had my baby, and I had David with me at my face, so all was good... but after 10 minutes of constantly bleeding and the 2 doctors working together and "whispering" about what was going on and what they were doing … was concerning and I started getting in my head and worrying about what was going to happen with me... David was constantly assuring me that everything would be okay as well as the doctors. 

Finally, we have our new bundle of joy and are the happiest new parents ever, in our own little world. I was blessed with my sister in law who is a photographer and had time to snap some really special moments of my new family becoming one. They are truly beautiful and make me smile for my future. David, my partner, has been amazing throughout this entire journey from the beginning to the end, I wouldn't trade him for anything and he did just as good as me! I know he will be a wonderful daddy as I will be a wonderful mommy, and together we will be a wonderful family with our new cute little burrito, Heidi. 

Even though it was hard work, pain and dedication obviously, it was all worth t in the end! please feel free to share your stories below in the comments, comment on mine or just hit that little upvote button and show me some love! stay tuned for a new blog post about my 1st 2 weeks being a momma and how it has affected me and my partner David. 
Thank you for taking the time to read my lovely birth story and I'll keep you posted!

XOXO, MM

![DSC_03912.jpg](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmewZJDKT5Vomjj73ma3pnQig9nCseNA29WEuxr3YefXF9/DSC_03912.jpg)