This week, Tuesday was typical training day. It usually consists of a long run and a group triathlon specific swim session in the pool. Depending on how organized I am that day, the swim happens immediately after I've been running. So I'm already somewhat cooked before I get into the water. Ideally I should run in the morning so I have some recovery time and if I am really fortunate, a short nap before the swim session in the evening. 

![swim swim.jpg](https://steemitimages.com/DQmXta3pZ3ddxCynfqWeAZRnN1YqTyf9xVmQF31SNzo1nhM/swim%20swim.jpg)
New goggles, they hide the expression of pain much better, good advantage in the realm of psychological warfare. 

*“Appear weak when you are strong, and strong when you are weak.”*
**Sun Tzu, The Art of War**


  However, it was not one of those days. It being a medium load training week I had an 18 km long run  on undulating terrain and then a 10 minute turn around time before I had to be at the pool in the water ready to smash the session.  The run was a bit of a nightmare, my left leg wasn't playing ball at all, it was pretty sore, I'm not sure why, but nothing was clicking or super painful so I pressed on. I argued in my head that any kind of ache or pain could pop up during the marathon of an Ironman so this was a good opportunity to battle through any kind of aching pain while I was out training. Later checking the run data,  my right leg was working an extra 5% to make up for what the left leg wasn't doing. 

![Screen Shot 2018-03-15 at 9.59.22 AM.png](https://steemitimages.com/DQmbZdr9w1exE89QxvAWGEUirD8ChjLhBKc2A2oCjwkLRd5/Screen%20Shot%202018-03-15%20at%209.59.22%20AM.png)
Uneven ground contact balance that is normally spot on 50/50. 


After that, it was refreshing to jump into the cold pool water. My legs were cooked so kicking was a agonising, and I had very little glycogen left in my muscles after an hour and a half of running, so this is where the real battle began. 

*The fight begins...* 


So the way group training works is, the pool gets divided into four lanes dividing people based on their swim abilities. I go for the second fastest lane. There were only three of us in this lane, a man and a woman, both regulars. The guy is a little faster than I am, he's usually good to chase. When we go full gas I can just about keep up with him keeping my finger tips at his toes, getting some drafting affect, allowing him to take some of the water resistance away. But today was a nightmare. I could only just hold on and I'd lose him towards the end of each set, pretty demoralizing. Especially when swimming is your weakest discipline. 

  After about 10 minutes into the 1 hour session when I'd reach out to the side of the pool to grab on to arrange myself to push back off to start the next length, I'd find myself drifting too early and falling short of the pool side by just inches. I'd float there for a few seconds thinking.

*"I could just stop, stop right now and let myself drown here..."*  
  "But none of that, just kick one more time, grab the side push off and give chase".

  I fought on, the seconds ticked by like minutes and the minutes like hours. I had no idea how I was going to make it to the end without completely blowing out. Everyone was moving at speed, I started to get angry looking at them thinking.

  *" I'm doing exactly what they are doing, HOW ARE THEY GOING FASTER THAN ME..?!"*

I didn't let this rage affect my desire to keep moving. The way I saw things was I can stay here in the pool and be angry, and get flustered and try to make it to the end. Or I can quit, get out the pool, leave early and be angry with myself for the rest of the day for quitting. **Those were my options**. 

  I was wearing a new set of goggles, because my beloved old ones were done. kept on leaking and filling up with water, they had done their time. How does this relate? Before I'd spend most previous swim group training sessions crashing into the lane ropes because I could barely see with my old pair of goggles. But I figured this wouldn't be a problem anymore with my new pair (which are outstanding). **WRONG**, the lane ropes at my pool are trash. They are virtually invisible. They are the width of shoe laces and have only a few tiny fist sized floats which are FEW and far between. So on top of my fatigue and already frustrated state, I was still crashing into the lane ropes and getting tangled, scratching the sides of my forearms while I fought with the water to gain more speed. I'd take this rage out on the water, violently over reaching on the catch phase to grab as much water as I could to pull myself through the water. As my shoulders were doing all the work because my legs were cooked from running. 

  The minutes continued to tick by like hours. I couldn't hold on to the guy's feet anymore, gaps were constantly opening adding to my irritation. I really wanted to quit, to just cry into my goggles while I stared down at the black line at the bottom of the pool, by this point my form had deserted me. But I wasn't going to let mere emotion get the better of me, so I fought on. 

  After about 45 minutes into the session, the other guy in my lane, got out. Said something to the coach leading the session then shuffled off. He was done, and broken. Turns out it wasn't just me who was suffering. This was reassuring, not because I took comfort in the fact that someone better than me was hurting and had to quit. But because we were suffering as a collective. Now I was alone and had no one to draft behind to take some of the resistance of the water. Which made the last 15 minutes the most painful. All the final few sets were at 95% max effort. All out, focused on lung bursting speed. We made it to the end.

  After getting out the pool and changing, I headed out to were everyone put their shoes back on. Everyone looked like the walking dead, even the guys from the faster lane. I didn't feel so bad about suffering anymore. It was over, I could relax for the rest. I deliberately schedule tough training on Tuesday, because its buy on get one free from Dominos, I can't fully enjoy pizza unless its been fought for. 

  Training wise its better to endure the frustration of a session going badly, than just get flustered and quit. If you quit the frustration will follow you for the rest of the day, like and overbearing shadow. But if you put all the rage to one side, get it done, say no to giving up and finish the session, then you can walk from the session with your head held high. In the moments of anger and frustration with yourself because you're not performing at your best, a few short prayers for strength will go a long way...Trust me. 

The words ring true in my head in hardship:

I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.
**Philippians 4:13**
  >**The only bad session is the one you didn't show up to.**