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Time and again, The Adversary shows up to compete with me in conflict.<br>
Time and again, I engage with him on that level.<br>
Time and again, hatred leads to more hatred and violence leads to more violence.<br>
<br>
Our battles are savage, thousands upon thousands of precious broken hearts<br>
and so much blood...the carnage too great for my spirit sometimes.<br>
<br>
Primal defense mechanisms activated, I attack perceived attack.<br>
Motivated by pain, I am vicious.&nbsp;<br>
More powerful than the Incredible Hulk, I am Kali unleashed. &nbsp;<br>
Blinded by rage, I lash out and destroy...and my actions cause&nbsp;more suffering and unspeakable pain.<br>
<br>
I perpetuate samsara--<br>
and perpetuate samsara and perpetuate samsara and <em>holy shit</em> it's a trap it's a trap it's a trap!!<br>
<br>
I can't do this anymore; I’m so tired.<br>
I'm a grown-ass lady, and this Spy vs. Spy game<br>
of complete annihilation takes too much energy to maintain.<br>
<br>
So how do I change the game?...<br>
<br>
...maybe I've been looking at him from a wonky angle…<br>
<br>
While he may challenge me on the physical/mental/emotional plane--and I may take the bait again and again--<br>
maybe he’s here to make me a spiritual ninja…<br>
<br>
Maybe I can stop blaming him for being a shit and instead <em>thank</em> him for honing me as a weapon of love…<br>
<em>Maybe I can acknowledge the deep and nasty and scary pain he stirs up in me and get myself a healing instead of a fight…<br>
<br>
</em>Maybe my healing can bring healing to him too and amend the damage I've inflicted...<br>
<br>
<strong>Maybe if I don’t size up to him in a warrior stance, then there will be no battle.</strong><br>
<br>
I have to admit that I was in dishonor acknowledging this formidable Foe, so attached to his form I was! &nbsp;<br>
<br>
It doesn't matter if he's an asshole, or that he “deserves” it--my &nbsp;honor is independent of his. I demonstrate MY values through each choice. Each action demonstrates MY character.&nbsp;<br>
<br>
And motherfuck me if I didn't JUST swear to&nbsp;<br>
Stand.&nbsp;<br>
In.&nbsp;<br>
Love.<br>
<br>
This is invincibility practice.<br>
This is master training.<br>
This is how to love the enemy.</p>
<p>To hurt him is to hurt me.<br>
<br>
Like reaching the last level of Mike Tyson's Punch Out, I'm grateful to FINALLY be able to rise to my heights for the challenge.<br>
<br>
<strong>May every casualty we've inflicted inspire lasting peace.</strong><br>
<br>
I’m so grateful we didn’t kill each other, dear one; I bow to you.<br>
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💛 Sara!<br>
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