I planned this event right before me and my ex-boyfriend separated a couple of weeks ago. I chose not to cancel... But this past Wednesday I would be reminded that people and situations are not always what they seem to be, and for some reason, we only remind ourselves of our blessings when the year is about to come to a close.

<center> 
![cutest.jpg](https://steemitimages.com/DQmV95BSdWwHmHguY47tQgJ66LuZWrmYX2H1mWMzV2DPwr8/cutest.jpg)<h6>*Myself and childhood friends; Meifonn (center), Vivianne (right)*</h6></center>

---

### The Importance of Individuality
A couple of weeks back I made [the tough decision to break up with my ex](https://steemit.com/story/@shello/shello-s-diary-16-timeline-jumping), and being a female  finding herself alone for the holidays made me feel weaker as a person. When people get together, they eventually become comfortable in the relationship, and somewhat dependent/reliant on the other, and without "another half", I was feeling lost. No more would I have a guarantee on being called, and asked if I was okay. No more sleepovers and random lunch dates, no automatic reassurance of my worth to another human being. Although we made plans for this together, I didn't want my relationship status to dictate what I would be doing.

---

### It's Not About Who Isn't There
as much as it is who actually shows up. A lot of people I considered close friends were canceling the day before, and the day of- Even after confirming that they would attend the holiday karaoke. A person that even went through giving me hell about having a singing battle the night before, ended up ignoring messages from me the day of, and just not showing up. People say they forgot, or had to work, although ahead notice was given. I completely understood though, I haven't been going outside much recently, and maybe my company didn't mean as much as they said it did online. 

I ended showing up a full 40 minutes early to confirm my room reservation and get a couple of drinks in, to calm my nerves beforehand. My Snapchat began to look concerned because at some point, I was wondering if anyone would show up at all. It's not the most enjoyable to be sharing your solo adventures without any friends or family.

I was almost ready to accept my losses when I saw my friend and roommate, Kevin, walk over to the entrance 15 minutes before the event was to start. He was honestly surprised that no one else arrived before him, and concluded that with how many people I knew, this was actually odd, and not in my head. Turns out, that one of his good friends and his regular crew was doing a birthday party, and he decided to leave early to hang out with me. Even though we live together, that was meaningful to me. We had a couple of drinks before a couple of my friends; Alex, and Wayson also arrived at 10pm on the dot. 

There is some people here, so now the event is a success! This pair of friends I have known for 10 years plus, save for awkward introductions. Wayson sang a bit, before having to leave for his early shift the next morning, and I invited Alex out to be around people a little more, because he has been recently been going through depression. 

---

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xvqXFLI9IZA

<center><h6>*Kevin singing Jason Mraz's - I'm Yours*</h6></center>

---

### Singing Nerves
We ordered a few flavored soju bottles for everyone to have shots, and began combing through fun songs to sing. At one point I chose to sing "I'm Yours", as it's a very popular song in Hawaii, that everyone knows. When I was dating Jake, he knew that music was a big part of my life, but never once put his pride away to sing with me on a song before. He refused to sing at my birthday karaoke. 

Imagine my face when Kevin grabbed the second mic halfway through one of my favorite songs, although he has a reputation for never singing at these kinds of events either. I was almost brought to tears that he could get over his shyness to have fun at my event, it meant a lot to me- and I snuck this video. 

I made the right choice about  who actually cared enough about me, that I should be living with c:  Kevin absolutely hates singing in public, but he did it for me!

---

### Late Arrivals

Not everyone could show up at 10pm, because some of my friends were working at the restaurant until midnight. Kevin had to return home after, and as he was walking out the door, my childhood friend; Meifonn called me, to let me know that she was leaving her friend's party... And was on her way.

At midnight, Meifonn and Vivianne both arrived. I've known Meifonn since 6th grade, and Vivianne for 20+ years. It started to get more lively, as everyone from Shokudo (the restaurant I used to work at) were getting off work, and hitting up their favorite bar, which is where I was having the Karaoke event! 

---

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RjGxXN4fzbk

<center><h6>*Myself, Meifonn, and Vivianne singing Vennesa Carlton's - A Thousand Miles*</h6></center>

---

### After Party
After Cafe Gangnam closed at 2am, our entire group joined up with the staff from Shokudo and headed over to an after-hours bar open until 4am. Bartenders, servers, bussers, and hostesses, just all trying to get a bit wild.

<center>![akiha and kanaha.jpg](https://steemitimages.com/DQmb8gtMz5GeZcHUjYtwaxURBEuX7cXheJZ1LpngRzuSz25/akiha%20and%20kanaha.jpg)<h6>*Akiha (left) is a hostess, and Kanaha (right) is a sushi chef!*</h6></center>

I was able to see my friend Akiha again, and meet a new friend Kanaha! There are both J1 Visas, working in Hawaii for the next year. There is some mystery if I still work at the restaurant or not, but mostly I am just around as friends. 

---

### The Decision That Changed the Night
When the Lounge we were all at closed, and everyone more or less sloshed, everyone made plans for who was driving who home, everyone leaves with friends. My friends are a couple, and they had a short dispute because she was sober to drive, and he wanted to be a man haha! He ended up driving me Akiha, Kanaha, and a car full of people home. This was until he made a left turn from a right lane, without stopping. 

We were pulled over for this, but he got taken in for DUI.  He spoke with the cops for a while before they made their decision because he was trying to make sure his friends and coworkers got home safe. The girlfriend ended up having to drive everyone home, except for me. The J1 Visas gave her $100 towards the bail of $500, and without missing a beat I put up $200. My friend was shocked, because I was already paying as an event host, and they were the ones who offered me a ride. At 4 o'clock in the morning there isn't going to be anyone up to help out, and plus they've had me sleepover a lot, and have done some awesome things for me in the past. 

<center>**The money didn't matter, I just wanted to have her boyfriend safe. 
I know that they would have done the same for me!**</center>

---

We got to the main station but had to wait 2 hours for processing, when they called his name on the intercom, she walked over. 

"Do you have the $750 in cash ready?"

We looked at each other, and I decided to pull out another $200 from an ATM, then we swung by her house to pick up $50 in cash she had at home. People just don't have $750 lying around for this kind of stuff.  Again, I would not want one of my friends to be in this kind of situation. He got out a little before 8am, and they dropped me off at home.  

---

### Back to Normal
We made arrangements for them to reimburse when they can.  My friend texted me the following morning, exclaiming that she would not have known what to do at all, if I wasn't there and how truly grateful she was to be my friend. I think back on this whole night as a reminder that not everyone is who they seem to be at first.  Some people only want to be around when it's convenient, while others will drop plans and be there for you.  

<center>**As much as we think we are, no one is alone in this life. 
I hope you enjoyed my story, and happy holidays everyone!**</center> 

---

<center>![BANNER_THE_PROJECT.png](https://steemitimages.com/DQmRdqBoeH2KXJvT74GhRiYPYHL8x23wEKvDv1y1BsJpEh6/BANNER_THE_PROJECT.png)</center>