What Comparison Does To You by stach

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· @stach ·
$47.52
What Comparison Does To You
![](https://steemitimages.com/DQmbJuQEYsb1igwtsMrzRyRv6fGRJtwLDCeVbvsENnTWL59/image.png) 
The human mind works in a way that comparing ourselves with others is almost like default. Comparison is a basic human impulse. Very often, we relate information about others to ourselves whenever we are confronted with others. It's part of a natural process of reflected appraisal, where we develop a sense of who we are from how others view us.
This impulsive comparison can be traced to our inherent need to protect ourselves and assess threats.
The people we usually compare ourselves to, tend to be those we most closely identify with as well as those within our personal orbit. The people we can categorically call our mates

When we're rely on others opinions for our sense of self, only feeling good if we get positive feedback or markers of status, we're putting ourselves in line for depression. 

In some ways though, it can be helpful to make comparisons. The inspiration you feel about someone else's achievements can increase the motivation to improve your own life. When you discover that your abilities are a notch above someone else's, it can boost your self-esteem. 
When we spend some time with those who are less fortunate and recognize our own vulnerability, downward comparison can increase feelings of compassion and concern for others.
But comparisons can also leave you feeling super inferior or depressed.
If you haven’t learned the art of not making comparisons, it might be difficult to stop
#### Impact of Social Media
Social media profiles paint very rosy pictures that can be very misleading.
People are most likely to share peak experiences and flattering news about themselves. Social media is like fuel poured on the flame of comparison, geometrically increasing the information about people that we're exposed to and forcing our minds to assess them.
Also, social media can make us think we care about some things more than we actually do. We weren't always concerned with how or where acquaintances shop or how well they're doing at work or the exotic cities where they vacationed. But when these social media cliches meet our self-reflective moments, say at 2a.m, over and over again, we suddenly start to consider what's stopping us from shopping in similar places or how we're due for promotion at our workplace but nothing has been mentioned about it yet or wonder why we haven't visited any of those exotic places yet.

Sometimes, people's posts could make you feel like you're not living your life to the fullest even though ordinarily, or if you found yourself living a century ago, you'd be very content with your present way of living.
### Strengths Vs Weaknesses
One thing about comparison is that it is never equal. Most times we’re comparing our strengths to other people’s weaknesses or vice versa. We don’t usually weigh things equally. That you’re good at something than most of your peers does not mean there’s nothing they’re good at that you’re not skilled in.

Psychologists divide social comparisons into two main categories—downward and upward. Downward comparison involves comparing yourself to someone you perceive as worse off than yourself, and upward comparison involves comparing yourself to someone you perceive as better off. The comparisons may be based on appearance, health, intelligence, ability, social status, wealth, or any other attribute.

The effects of these different types of social comparison depend on how we process the information. When an upward comparison inspires us to try harder, it's actually helping our personality.

It’s normal to wonder how we measure up to other people.  But the aspect we choose to dwell on makes all the difference.
When we focus too narrowly on others’ negative attributes, we may miss the complete picture of their strengths and successes, which limits our ability to empathize and support them in good times and bad.

#### Is It Possible To make Unbiased Comparisons?
Yes! it’s just a matter of perspective. When we compare and contrast our common humanity, it can yield very different results, promoting connection and understanding rather than distance and jealousy.
So, just before you make the next comparison, make sure that you're doing it evenly; strength for strength, weakness for weakness. Also, if it's not going to make you a better person, it would be wise to drop it
We need to bear in mind that even the most successful people struggle in some ways and are just as human and imperfect as we are—and that, for all our weaknesses and struggles, we are just as capable of greatness, we have potential!
*****
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Reference [1](https://www.psarticles/201711/the-comparison-traphttps://www.google.com.ng/amp/s/www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/in-love-and-war/201607/the-perils-comparing-ourselves-others%3fampychologytoday.com/us/), [2](https://www.google.com.ng/amp/s/www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/in-love-and-war/201607/the-perils-comparing-ourselves-others%3famp)
👍  , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , and 2 others
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vote details (66)
@warpedpoetic ·
$0.45
Great post. People should understand that everyone has his or her own path in life. No two persons path to success is the same. Comparing yourself to another whether upward or downward is dangerous. 
Comparing upwards can push you to be more productive, true, but it can also make you desperate and desperate people do stupid things. 
Downward comparison is akin to pity sometimes but there are times when it becomes mockery. When you begin to think that it is because you are special that is why have all that you own. 
I'd rather plow my path,  focus on my race and pray that I meet everyone at the finish line. Peace.
👍  ,
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@abdul1234 ·
$0.04
This is highly inspirational, exactly what I want to read right now, because of my current situation and am happy to visit your blog, thanks so much am motivated
👍  ,
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@tts ·
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@samtexprints ·
$0.04
Good, educative and sensible information we all need to read in order for us to understand life more than the way we see it, you see naturally all of us are in one or two ways fall victim of this comparison especially when things fall apart but the truth remains that we can't live some else's life so we should embrace this article whole heatedly and also learn to be ourselves in all circumstances because in life generally 10% is what happens to us and 90% is how we react to it. Comparison Is not a solution to a better life but a distraction. Thank you very much @stach for this opportunity for me to air my opinion. God bless all steemians.
👍  
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@normalbro ·
$0.04
Thanks everyday @stach for reflective posts like this.
👍  
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@joyart ·
$0.04
It's a blessing to read this..... Thanks so much
👍  
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@limitlessfash ·
$0.04
>>So, just before you make the next comparison, make sure that you're doing it evenly; strength for strength, weakness for weakness

I agree with you on this.

Comparison isn't bad in itself, it depends on how we do it and for what reason.

If we do it to improve or to get better, it will be justifiable, if not, it isn't worth it.
👍  
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@ordosjc ·
In my personal opinion, if you want to be a successful person, you should look for examples of those leaders who have achieved it in the area they want.
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@bafspotlight ·
$0.04
Lovely post, comparison can make one feel inferior and think less on how to improve on ones life. It is a thief of joy
👍  ,
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@liltom ·
What most people seem to forget, is the fact that God created us uniquely and differently. This means that each and everyone of us have our own distinct  timelines. The way things work out for 'A' won't necessarily be the same for 'B'. Marrying at 35 or 40 doesn't mean you are a failure neither does it mean that you are backward in life. Stop the comparison. The moment you start comparing yourself with others, you are bound to be stuck in life.

### Live your life and let others live theirs.
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@sandralouis ·
Well, nobody is perfect...
I embrace my weaknesses and work on them. At the same time, I am grateful for my strengths. It is true though that sometimes we tend to compare or even be compared, but if we love ourselves, those comparisons are meaningless and will only make us feel inadequate. Believe that we are enough and that is important to appreciate our lives...
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