Black Widow: Oh! Look at that. You’re dressed so well.
[Credit](www.google.com)
Sherlock: (Looking all around) Really?
[Credit](www.google.com)
Black Widow: Yes. You almost look handsome.
Sherlock: (Annoyed) Really!
Black Widow: Don’t worry honey, you’re doing just fine. (Bringing her glass of wine to her lips) Tell me about yourself.
Sherlock: Well. There’s nothing much of interest about me. I solve crimes and help out the Scotland Yard when they run out of their depths, which is always. I play the violin every once in a while and occasionally fire bullets at a wall to piss off the land lady. I might appear strange to you, but that’s probably because I wanted to be a magician when I was young. (Picks up his glass of wine) That’s enough about me. How about you?
Black Widow: Me? Well there’s nothing much of interest about me. I was raised on a farm in Texas. Had a boring childhood. My father was infamous with his guns so it always scared the boys off. I moved to New York City and took up a job as a journalist. Although I do like detective journalism. Detectives have this aura about them, the aura of mystery and passion and brilliant minds. (Whispers) I find them irresistible.
Sherlock: Really? Well… that is… fascinating. With the mystery… and the aura… and irresistible? Wow.
Black Widow: (passes a seductive smile to Sherlock)
Sherlock: But do you have the habit of missing out on details when covering your stories?
Black Widow: (Taken aback) No. Why do you ask?
Sherlock: Well since while narrating your story you clearly missed out your Russian past, so I just got wondering.
Black Widow: (Looking all around) I don’t understand. What’re you trying to say?
Sherlock: Oh yes. Not missing out details but fabricating them. Interesting.
Black Widow: (puzzled)
Sherlock: Oh don’t look so horrified. I have had worse dates.
Black Widow: (Maintaining her composure) Ho..
Sherlock: How? Really? Bad question to lead with for a former KGB spy.
Black Widow: (Alarmed) How do you know?
Sherlock: Just like how I know that you were brainwashed and turned into a killing machine by the Soviets, had a certain Mr. Wolverine train you, before you decided to fight for good and joined the Avengers.
Black Widow: (Her mouth left open)
Sherlock: Oh don’t look so worried. When Tony Stark paid me a visit back in London, I dug into the Avengers, hacked a couple of profiles, got to know some nasty secrets. But stay unbothered. They’re safe with me. Also you’re really trying hard to not toy with your hair. That’s quite impressive since you’re clearly obsessed with it.
Black Widow: They told me you were good.
Sherlock: Wait. That impressed you? This date is surprisingly going well for me. Isn’t it? Well what would impress you further is the fact that you were under my radar since two days after you secretly paid a visit to my apartment and dropped this.
Sherlock pulls out a small plastic bag from under his coat containing a single strand of hair.
Black Widow: What is this?
Sherlock: This, Miss Romanoff, gave away your identity. A strand of red hair, clearly belonging to woman, in my bedroom? If you’d have paid a close attention to my apartment you’d have realised that it’s quite dusty.
Black Widow: To throw off potential dates?
Sherlock: Nope. See a spread of little dust works like a blanket, a single break in the dust line at the places that I never touch signifies the presence of either a strong draft of wind or an intruder. But the wind doesn’t differentiate in picking out the dust selectively, an intruder who is looking for something in the unlikeliest of places definitely would. Took me less than a minute to find that strand of hair. Now not many women have the pleasure of visiting my bedroom, let alone a redhead. A forensic investigation of a hair strand cannot help you identify a specific person but to a careful eye it can still give a lot of data. Simple lab tests can help you water down the heridity. Then there’s your habit of toying with your hair.
Black Widow: How?
Sherlock: An adult human loses around 100–150 strands of hair in a day, but naturally falling hair can only give you the mitochondrial DNA. A hair pulled from its roots on the other hand, as in a violent struggle contains the root pulp, which is a good source for nuclear DNA. Now if you’d have had a fight in my bedroom the breaks in the dust line would have been immense and would have definitely left something broken, but if that wasn’t the case and I still found the root pulp attached to your hair strand, it means that you were probably toying with your hair.
Black Widow: (amused) Brilliant!
Sherlock: A careful study helped me narrow down the possibilities of the origins of the hair. The mDNA is passed on from the mother to the offspring, took me a couple of hours to narrow down the origins to Russia. So a Russian redhead woman who broke into my home and snooped carefully, most probably looking for a disk that is of invaluable importance to the CIA and the SHIELD, but was retrieved by me some time ago while breaking down the crime network of Jim Moriarty? The dots instantly connected Miss Romanoff. So I was waiting for you to take me out to dinner.
Black Widow: Stark warned me that you’d blow me away with your charm.
Sherlock: Looks like we both agree on something. Anyway, I really enjoyed this date. I wish we could see each other more often but then again, our jobs won’t permit us to. Thank you for taking me out, but I’m afraid that now I’ve to return to solve some murders. And I’m sure that you have some bad guys to kill. (Stands up) Laters.
Black Widow: Mr. Holmes, before you leave won’t you fulfil a girl’s wish? See that man sitting two tables behind us? He’s my good friend Dr. Banner. His friend would like to have a word with you.
Sherlock: His friend?
Black Widow: Hulk. SMASH!