Steemit has restored my faith in humanity and has helped to save my life... 😊✌️🌿!!! by stevenalexander

introduceyourself · @stevenalexander · Dec 7 '17

$30.23

Steemit has restored my faith in humanity and has helped to save my life... 😊✌️🌿!!!

<html>
<h2><em><strong>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Where Can I Even Begin</strong></em></h2>
<p>What an absolute <em>journey</em> this has been for me. <em>Steemit</em> has been <em><strong>Life Changing </strong></em>and I don't say that lightly. I've never felt so at home and it's safe to say I'm here to stay :) I have real and beautiful information to share with my wonderful <em>steemian friends. </em>You guys are the reason I stay and I couldn't be more grateful for this community.&nbsp;Through some of my hardest times, I've been able to come here and feel safe. That is why I am going to share this with you.</p>
<p>https://steemitimages.com/DQma8x7pJsoaDSLtahabu9osTmz5CKgtbsagjGDzWvBea99/lost%20alone.jpg</p>
<p>That guy above is me holding a nickel but pretending it's a <em><strong>bitcoin</strong></em> lol. Oh man what a world we live in and what an incredible time to be alive, right? I've had an insane amount of ups and downs but the clear consistent thing in my life for the past 4 months has definitely been my belief in steemit. I believe that steemit has the ability to change the world.&nbsp;</p>
<p>It's safe to say that I never felt like I fit in my <em>whole life</em>. I always did "<em>things" </em>differently. I was the artist/musician of the family. The weird one. I couldn't focus in school and I had a hard time absorbing information that I didn't care about. I struggled to keep my grades up in high school and my parents tried everything. I was pretty unhappy to be completely <em>honest</em> and somewhere along the lines I got totally disconnected.&nbsp;My grades got to a point where we felt as though I needed to try medication for my ADHD which I was diagnosed with early on. The medication adderall was prescribed to me and little did I know it would be the biggest downfall of my high school years.&nbsp;</p>
<p>https://cdn.pixabay.com/photo/2015/06/19/09/39/lonely-814631_1280.jpg</p>
<p>The Adderall helped my attention span and my grades skyrocketed! it wasn't long before I turned my 70's into 90's on every test. My family was pleased and so was I. What I wasn't aware of the nasty side effects that were creeping up on me.&nbsp;I truly had no idea what kind of ride I was in for.</p>
<p>https://cdn.pixabay.com/photo/2016/12/05/19/43/pill-1884775_1280.jpg</p>
<p>Let's fast forward a few months. The adder all surpassed my appetite so I was never hungry and eating felt like a terrible burden. I was NEVER hungry! I never wanted to eat. The worst part about this is that I was on the wrestling team at the time. Everyday I had wrestling practice after school for a couple hours. Rigorous training which required unyielding amounts of energy. My body was completely breaking down. No food in my stomach, crashing from the adderall, and intensely working out was a pretty terrible combination. &nbsp;I didn't know what kind of damage I was doing to myself.&nbsp;</p>
<p>&nbsp; &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;https://media.giphy.com/media/ivH4UhEAPXNAI/giphy.gif</p>
<p>I was lost and even more alone before the medication. I didn't even recognize myself anymore. I was angry, hostile and manic. I would come home after wrestling practice like a total maniac. My parents were concerned and worried by my terrible mood swings. I wish I could've prevented all of this looking back but I'm now thankful for my story as it may help someone else. They took me back to the psychiatrist and instead of taking me off the adderall, they added more medications to try and "level" out my mood swings. At this point I was 16 years old living on a cocktail of mood stabilizers and other meds. My mindset only got worse. I absolutely hated who I had become. I was a zombie.Quite frankly I struggled to find a reason to be alive at this point. I stopped wrestling and fell into a terrible depression as they added more meds and kept trying to "fix"my "state of mind". I was scared to stop taking these meds by myself because they told me I would have severe withdrawals and possible seizures. I felt like a prisoner of my own mind. A lot of people would always tell me "well just stop if you don't want to take them". When I tell you I was scared to stop... I was SCARED to stop. Anytime id miss a dose of a certain medication I would feel even more messed up. So yeah I was frightened to live on them and frightened to live off them.&nbsp;</p>
<p>https://cdn.pixabay.com/photo/2017/10/31/09/47/good-night-2904747_1280.jpg</p>
<p>I was searching so bad for a light at the end of the tunnel but it was practically impossible to see one. I started crying out for help by self destructing. I started smoking pot which seemed to help take me outside of myself. I was a true mess. Combining drugs and mixtures to attempt feeling better would only make things worse. Looking back I don't even blame myself. I became suicidal. I was in a state of mind I don't wish on my worst enemy. I felt as though I had zero reason to live. My brain chemistry was so impaired that I did not think my life was worth it. I thank god every day for protecting me the way he has. After a few more years of suffering and a couple of failed &nbsp;attempts to not exist, I decided something had to give. I knew their had to be something better for me. My life was not meant for this suffering. Somewhere deep down in my fog filled mind I knew that something had to change because I was not put here for this. I just knew it.</p>
<p>https://cdn.pixabay.com/photo/2016/12/05/16/44/miracle-1884327_1280.jpg</p>
<p>It just came down to two simple things. Living..or Dying. I thought logically about it and decided well its not my time to die and I wasn't meant for that so if I am going to live, it certainly can no longer be like this. I was absolutely determined to come off of these medications and I was willing to die trying. With the help of a professional healthcare facility, I came off of 3 different medications in the course of 2 weeks. The rest was a breeze to ween off of after that. Those 2 weeks were painful. But I was able to find comfort knowing it was all coming to an end. My creativity and passion for music started coming back. I started writing songs again. I was able to breath fresh air. I felt as though I was being reborn. I was stuck in such a dark place for over 4 years... It was literally like living in a nightmare. I'm able to share my story today in the hopes it can help someone else. I just want to be real with the ones around me who have shown me nothing but love. What better way to give back to a community then by being yourself and getting personal. My life has made a complete 360. This past year has been one of the most experiential/ amazing years of my life. I'm truly living again and it never felt so good.</p>
<p>https://scontent.fmia1-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/14732378_10153806581027273_2114507765563588863_n.jpg?oh=bc9a38b600d7803ed68fccdda393b5e7&amp;oe=5A97BBF2https://scontent.fmia1-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/14732378_10153806581027273_2114507765563588863_n.jpg?oh=bc9a38b600d7803ed68fccdda393b5e7&amp;oe=5A97BBF2</p>
<p>My dreams are coming true right before my eyes and the best part is that I get to share it with you beautiful people! Even my darkest times. Thats okay! I get to be part of this wonderful community and its helping me continue on this bright path of love and peace. I get to take pictures of beautiful places and share it on steemit! I get to play music and write new songs and share it on steemit! I get to make friends for life all here on steemit! This is by far the most inspiring platform I've ever discovered and I can never repay my debt to steemit. It's like a dream here.. Sometimes I can't even believe its real but the best part is that its helping me build the life of my dreams. It's taking place right before my eyes in such positive light. I have so much gratitude for the gifts I've received and steemit is by far on the top of that list. Just the way I saw my life crumbling before my eyes in high school. Now its the exact opposite and steemit has allowed me to share and create freely with other individuals who have the same ultimate goal as I do! I will never stop fighting for freedom and peace. This is LOVE ! STEMIT IS LOVE! Thankyou to all of you who have been a part of this incredible community. It is my goal to help steemit grow and to continue loving others the way I was loved when I got here. Thankyou so much for letting me share parts of my story with you. Even the dark stuff because I made a promise to be real with you. I love you all so much and I can't wait to start posting more. I finally got over my writers block and decided to just go balls deep into the juicy stuff and it never felt better. STEEM ON MY WONDERFUL PEOLPLE!</p>
<p>https://scontent.fmia1-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/17629938_10154253240957273_8717203806215766698_n.jpg?oh=9874d97d52a586f3312ab6a877f693fb&amp;oe=5ACBA370</p>
<p>Bye for now:)</p>
</html>

👍 lyndsaybowes, teamsteem, kus-knee, walterjay, kenny-crane, teamhumble, wwf, mikepm74, mammasitta, ausbitbank, troilo, greenrun, battleaxe, fingolfin, gmuxx, acromott, fun-along-theway, choogirl, massivevibration, rodeo670, crimsonclad, coolguy123, fun-dr-n-light-n, fulltimegeek, karensuestudios, pnc, kubbyelizabeth, saffisara, virtualgrowth, melavie, steemprentice, igster, berkah, mrs.agsexplorer, stevenalexander, thealliance, cqf, redrica, benjm, hashclouds, uncommondream, greenstar, enginewitty, steemmatt, thinknzombie, as-i-see-it, rmaxhuni, mrgsocial, noxdarkness, stellastella, drawesome24, kalamtg, bmekiker, mollyparti, zarby, maaren, jayread, avgeaccesorios, socialspace, natra, iamjadeline, newsteemians, emilyl, lamech-m, and 13 others

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@fitrafarizil · Dec 7 '17

follow me i will follow you to,nice post

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@lopezdacruz · Dec 7 '17

welcome stevenalexander

happy steeming

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@axios · Dec 7 '17

$0.03

@stevenalexander your story reminds me a lot of my brother who had a similar rendezvous with ADHD medication which ultimately led to dark times (suicide attempt) and a real struggle. I was there the whole way so I got a good glimpse as to what that is like and for myself, I've struggled hardcore with depression for many years.

My brother is great now and I no longer struggle with depression. It's interesting how the tides turn in life. Life is always changing which is good and bad, but in the end, it's always moving. I think that's how I cope with a lot of difficult times in my life (especially now). I'm currently not sure how I'm going to afford rent next month...but at the same time I have all my savings invested in crypto...so it's like...clearly...the tides will change ;-)

Thanks for this amazing post brother. I wish you well and am excited to see you thrive! [Feel free to stop by my channel and say to say hi](https://steemit.com/blog/@axios/i-vlogged-for-7-days-straight-and-this-is-what-i-learned-about-myself) :) 

Cheers!

👍 stevenalexander

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@stevenalexander · Dec 7 '17

Thankyou for your heartfelt response ! I’m happy to hear your brother is doing well :) and yes your crypto savings are sure to explode and make you very happy lol 😂 keep on hanging in and have a positive attitude !

👍 axios

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@axios · Dec 7 '17

I appreciate you brother! Cheers!

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@drawesome24 · Dec 7 '17

$0.03

Amazing post my friend, I can't wait for you next ones. :)

👍 stevenalexander

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@stevenalexander · Dec 7 '17

Thankyou so much ! I appreciate that:)

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@stevenalexander · Dec 7 '17

Thankyou !

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@rodeo670 · Dec 7 '17

$0.04

Dude it's so good to see you back on here!  I'm really looking forward to seeing more of your posts!  Make sure to really come back to MSP and start making friends, that'll help you to really become stable on here and gain a real network of friends on the platform who will support you and your *awesome* content.  :) 

I loved this story man, very real, very relatable.  Having suffered from ADHD myself and put on Ritalin as a kid I can totally understand the emotions behind this story and I have been there as well.  The time I was on Ritalin was like the skinniest I was, I was basically a walking toothpick lol

👍 stevenalexander

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@stevenalexander · Dec 7 '17

Yeah man ADHD meds are no joke. It’s definitely something recommend staying away from if your prone to anxiety :/

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@melavie · Dec 7 '17

$0.04

This is a very honest and beautifully written protocol of a transformation! And i absolutely agree with you that steemit is love! The kindness and appreciation of the beautiful community here also gave me a lot of strength during the past months. And never be afraid to be real and share the dark stuff, because sometimes that's exactly what some People need to read to feel that there is someone out there who understands how they feel. Don't ever try to please people with positivity, rather be real and authentic. Thank you for sharing this with us!

👍 stevenalexander, mrgsocial

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@stevenalexander · Dec 7 '17

Awh Thankyou for your kind words ! I do believe authenticity is the best as well :) it’s tough sometimes but being real is the best thing one can do.

👍 mrgsocial

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@kus-knee · Dec 7 '17

$0.03

I'm glad to read that you are feeling and doing better. You are a very talented person and you've got a lot to offer! Keep up the good work!

👍 stevenalexander

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@stevenalexander · Dec 7 '17

Thanks so much @kus-knee :) your words and support has been so appreciated this whole time brother .

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@kenny-crane · Dec 7 '17

$0.04

I'm glad you're here on Steemit!  Your story of dark times shows how far you have come, and can be an inspiration for others.  I wish you all the best and thanks for sharing your story here!

👍 stevenalexander, pixiehunter, mrgsocial

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@stevenalexander · Dec 7 '17

$0.26

Thankyou so much Kenny I feel the same way about being able to inspire people ! Happy to get real and share my story :)

👍 kenny-crane, mrgsocial

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@battleaxe · Dec 7 '17

$0.03

Hi, that was raw but real, this is not Nirvana....don't expect there will not be hurt on here because there will be but wishing the best experience for you on steemit, Welcome
@battleaxe

👍 stevenalexander, mrgsocial

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@stevenalexander · Dec 7 '17

Thankyou for your honesty :) I wasn’t expecting it to be perfect for the rest of my time here but it’s sure been great so far .

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@steemitboard · Dec 7 '17

Congratulations @stevenalexander! You have completed some achievement on Steemit and have been rewarded with new badge(s) :

[![](https://steemitimages.com/70x80/http://steemitboard.com/notifications/posts.png)](http://steemitboard.com/@stevenalexander) Award for the number of posts published

Click on any badge to view your own Board of Honor on SteemitBoard.
For more information about SteemitBoard, click [here](https://steemit.com/@steemitboard)

If you no longer want to receive notifications, reply to this comment with the word `STOP`

> By upvoting this notification, you can help all Steemit users. Learn how [here](https://steemit.com/steemitboard/@steemitboard/http-i-cubeupload-com-7ciqeo-png)!

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@alidervash · Dec 7 '17

Great post and story ishonestly true one thank you for sharing with us.

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@stevenalexander · Dec 7 '17

Thankyou so much just for reading :)

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@gmuxx · Dec 7 '17

$0.02

Awesome read! Thank you for sharing. Steem has the power to change the world.

👍 mammasitta

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@stevenalexander · Dec 7 '17

Thankyou so much that means a lot ! I truly believe the same thing about it :)

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@mammasitta · Dec 7 '17

$0.03

Look at that smile and rainbow! 
The light is shining on your way.....
What joy to know you!

👍 stevenalexander, mrgsocial

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@kravtsova · Dec 7 '17

Hello my friend 🤗
Very nice post  👍

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@wwf · Dec 7 '17

@stevenalexander, it is wonderful to see somebody with the courage to share like what you just did.  I too have struggled for a good part of my life and I write about it as well.  I have been free of the addictions and crap for nearly 17 years and going strong.  Bravo for doing the work and sharing like you did.  Lead by example and you just did it!  <3

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@givonwayne · Dec 8 '17

Awesome journey. Thank you for sharing.

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@steemitboard · Dec 8 '17

Congratulations @stevenalexander! You have completed some achievement on Steemit and have been rewarded with new badge(s) :

[![](https://steemitimages.com/70x80/http://steemitboard.com/notifications/votes.png)](http://steemitboard.com/@stevenalexander) Award for the number of upvotes

Click on any badge to view your own Board of Honor on SteemitBoard.
For more information about SteemitBoard, click [here](https://steemit.com/@steemitboard)

If you no longer want to receive notifications, reply to this comment with the word `STOP`

> By upvoting this notification, you can help all Steemit users. Learn how [here](https://steemit.com/steemitboard/@steemitboard/http-i-cubeupload-com-7ciqeo-png)!

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@karensuestudios · Dec 8 '17

Yup YUP YUp YUP YUp! I agree 100% hehhee... funny we decided to post about how we love Steemit today! :P

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@teamhumble · Dec 8 '17

$0.02

100% upvote. feel the love. i agree with you so much on this. one of the best communities online i've seen in over a decade. peace brother.

👍 stevenalexander

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@stevenalexander · Dec 9 '17

awh thankyou so much for that @teamhumble ! That’s so awesome of you and I really Appreciate the support :) steemit is the best place ever lol

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@newsteemians · Dec 8 '17

$0.53

Welcome to Steem Community @stevenalexander! As a gentle reminder, please keep your master password safe. The best practise is to use your private posting key to login to Steemit when posting; and the private active key for wallet related transactions. 

 In the New Steemians project, we help new members of steem by education and resteeeming their articles. Get your articles resteemed too for maximum exposure. You can learn more about it here: https://steemit.com/introduceyourself/@gaman/new-steemians-project-launch

👍 gaman

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@chelseajo · Dec 8 '17 (edited)

$0.02

WELCOME!! I am brand new to Steemit as of yesterday as well! So happy you decided to keep fighting! I look forward to reading more from you!!! :) If youd like to learn more about me drop by my introduce myself! :)




https://steemit.com/introduceyourself/@chelseajo/just-a-small-town-girl-livin-in-steemit-world

👍 stevenalexander

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@gabrielorozco · Dec 8 '17

Steven that is really good, I feel fantastic because i meet new people in this place Steemit

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@saffisara · Dec 9 '17

$0.03

This was such a beautiful writing and love how you opened up and shared your hard times. It's never easy going outside of your comfort zone, but sometimes it helps to.
Sorry for all the hard years you had to go through. But all experience gives you a new perspective and strength. 
Like you steemit has changed my life and I have met so many amazing people that I'm so blessed. Can wake up with a thankful heart and knowing there are hope 😊 
I wish you a great continued journey and I know you will turn your life experiences into your strength. 
Thank you for sharing. Inspiring

👍 stevenalexander

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@stevenalexander · Dec 9 '17

Thankyou for your heartfelt response :) it truly is the best place ever and it truly has changed my life for the better ! Love what I get here :) so happy to see you doing well with your beautiful animals !

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@saffisara · Dec 9 '17

You are welcome, so well deserved 😊 such a great story to tell and will inspire many people as well and help those who can relate
Im happy to se you are doing well and that you are excited about your future here. 
Wish you all the best in life and stay just as you are my friend 🤗 cheers!

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@stellastella · Dec 9 '17

You welcome @stevenalexander to steemit. Am glad your journey on steemit is like a dream and steemit has restored your faith in humanity . I wish you have more lovely time. I upvoted you.

Am on a contest now and I really need your vote. All you need do is click this link https://steemit.com/contest/@jaynie/the-never-would-i-ever-challenge-3-sports

And then upvote my comment @stellastella in the comment section. 
That will help me win the contest. Thanks a lot for your anticipated help. You can join the contest also if you desire.

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@realtorsuesherry · Dec 9 '17

Calling all steemit mommas and pappas putting their kids on medication this i a great honest read!  Sadly, i am guilty! But thankfully my kid figured out she would rather be a c student, creative and sane then on the adderal track.  Proud steemit mom! stay healthy and happy stevenalexander!

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`root_title`	"Steemit has restored my faith in humanity and has helped to save my life... 😊✌️🌿!!!"
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