How Do You Know If You're Not Giving Yourself Enough Credit for Your Good Feelings? by boydg

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· @boydg ·
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How Do You Know If You're Not Giving Yourself Enough Credit for Your Good Feelings?
Just because you "think" that something bad is about to happen doesn't make it so. Feelings are a combination of our expectations and beliefs, which when they're mixed, can make us experience an array of emotions that run the gamut from embarrassment to elation. Think of a loved one being taken away in a car accident just before a big event occurs. People might become very quiet or start crying, or even scream. All of these are examples of the emotions people experience when they think something awful is about to happen, but they don't have an inkling that the situation is actually awful.

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But our feelings don't just happen on their own. We use our thoughts to interpret them, and those thoughts can influence our emotions. Anger and other negative feelings like jealousy or mistrust can be turned into feelings of shame, embarrassment, or even fear if we allow ourselves to be swayed by them. So if we can recognize how these negative feelings are influencing us, we can take steps to change them before they take control. Here are some techniques for changing your negative emotions into more positive ones.

Recognize the Difference Between True Feelings and "utic" Feelings - Many of us are familiar with the term "therapy." Therapists use this term in order to distinguish between emotional "feelings" and physical reactions that are typically caused by stress or anxiety. Feelings like anger or shame are often due to a stressful life event that left an individual feeling unhappy and confused. True feelings, such as pride and happiness, are much more empowering and positive.

Focus on Your True Self - Our negative self talk can keep us from doing things that would make us feel good, such as picking up the phone when someone calls. Focusing on our authentic self can help us get through those times when we get turned off by our inner critic instead of our "therapist." Realize that we all have things that are valuable to us and that we don't need to waste time and energy fighting them.

![image.png](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmdXwGMkQg9DjMW9PAndbgsbjhTDBwugFm3UMUR9PNXPC3/image.png)
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Realize That Feeling Stops When We Realize the Negative - When we face our negative feelings, sometimes we want to run away from them rather than face them head on. This can be a self-defeating behavior. Instead, focus on the changes you want to see in yourself, and push yourself forward when you encounter a bout of negative self talk.

Replace Negative Thinking With Positive Ones - When we use the techniques above, we'll begin to notice that our negative feelings start to ebb and flow less. At first, this may not be happening. Try visualizing something pleasant and rewarding when you feel overwhelmed. Try picturing a clean, white smile on your face instead of brown, dingy grins. Picture your future instead of fretting about what might be, and you'll find that the unpleasant feelings you're experiencing quickly diminish.
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