| operations | | 0. | | 0. | comment |
|---|
| 1. | | parent_author | "" |
|---|
| parent_permlink | introduceyourself |
|---|
| author | accio |
|---|
| permlink | wtf-is-this-oh-heyyyy-whats-up-steemit |
|---|
| title | "WTF IS THIS?!?! Oh heyyyy, whats up Steemit? ;)" |
|---|
| body | "##### _**How? How can one go about a simple explanation? Please someone tell me, I need to know.**_
>Hi, I’m Accio, I’m a single mom to one kid ~~demon spawn~~ but I’m a live in nanny for my niece and nephews so really I’m a stay at home mom of seven ~~please god someone send help and tacos~~. Though I love them more than life ~~I really do I swear~~ I can’t nanny them forever, so I just started on the path to become a librarian ~~could I be any duller?~~.
>
>I spend my days ~~yelling and ripping my hair out~~ watching the rugrats, ~~staring at the fifteen loads of laundry with terror for an hour before I man up and attack~~ cleaning, and ~~pretending I cook, if I try to make anything more complicated than dinosaur nuggets and corn dogs I’m instantly drowned in a tidal wave of ‘I don’t liiiike iiiiits’~~ cooking... Really I just dance around to 50s music in my apron ~~dancing like an idiot soothes my rage, and my apron makes me feel like a bad Betty Crocker bitch~~ and organizing ~~lack of neurotic compartmentalization leads to heated conversations with self while wandering in circles accomplishing nothing~~! June Cleaver is my ultimate idol ~~because I have a complex~~, and I strive to be the best I can be ~~unrealistically perfect, cue guilt and shame~~ everyday.
>
>I’m really happy that I’ve found an outlet where I can express myself ~~because if I don’t write this insanity out my brain may explode~~ by sharing my ~~crazy lady survival guide~~ life tips ! Everything from my ~~compulsive perfectionism in a book~~ planner techniques to ~~how to throw shit in a crockpot and then make four peanut butter jelly sandwiches because no one likes it~~ how I cook for my family to ~~the things I need to do to not murder~~ my path to spiritual enlightenment , and all the little things in between that make my life so special ~~who am I, what planet am I on?~~!
# Is that right?! Is that what I’m supposed to do?!?
Do you think I’m crazy yet? I feel crazy; most of the time at least. I take care of seven kids, **SEVEEEEN KIIIDS**...
_here’s a picture of me trying to survive the two four year olds, they were fighting about the right way to hug._
<p align="center">
<img src="https://i.imgur.com/1j5wUne.jpg">
</p>
As if that wasn’t enough to make me crazy on its own I also have a Sun in the 12th house conundrum going on; See I’m not actually from this galaxy with you creatures. I have my own _it's waaaayyyy better than yours_ and if I allowed myself to flow I’d be completely out of touch with your reality, but somehow I got stuck here and we now coexist... to be honest I don’t really always know how to function in this world, it can be such a confusing place. A couple of times I got really confused and made this super silly mistake of giving humans (particularly the male variety) every tiny little part of me and just lived as a hollow shell monster and completely ruined my life. Haha good times...
I am learning though! I’m learning that it can be a beautiful place, that it's okay to work on fixing my own credit score, or go do the things that I like to do, to say no sometimes, and that I have every potential to achieve my own goals instead of being consumed by defective humans, and that I don’t have to hurt myself trying to wear skin that doesn’t fit me, I can just be me… I can give every tiny little part of myself to ME, **that is an actual thing I can do!** I had even heard once that there are humans out there who like to help each other and I think I met some! How exciting is that?! I’m seeing very new perspectives on this confusing world and the learning experience is such a fabulous adventure!
I’m doing all sorts of things that I've always wanted to do, and one of those things is this thing. Blogging, I mean. I’ve always wanted to, but been too ‘occupied’ and self deprecating to give it a shot. So here I am in all of my ‘messy mom bun’-’food on my fuzzy pajamas’-’what is that smell?’-’oh dear god I found the smell’ glory deciding that I am going to do it. I am going to be a blogging boss posting my brain dumps on a supercoolwebsite where there is seemingly endless opportunities and mayevenfundmyeducation whileIgotoschooltobealibrarian andonlyinteractwiththegoodkindofhumansandmaybesometimes... **breathe**_calm bodies, okay I got this_. I am manifesting my reality, bringing forth an entirely new experience of the human condition, (which is what the name means by the way, Accio is the summoning spell in Harry Potter).
So here I sit, diligently word vomiting all over google docs, the soothing tunes of an almost violent rendition of “DADDY SHARK DO DO DO DO DO” and “Aunttttie my silly putty got stuck in the vacuuuuum” a perfect ambian…. SHIT, did my eight year old do his reading today?!?!... _I asked him loudly, he did not… sure enough is now…_
<a href="https://imgur.com/ZacBBAl"><img src="https://i.imgur.com/ZacBBAl.jpg" title="source: imgur.com" /></a>
What the hell was I even talking about?... oh right, _>>fast forward past more rambling before it becomes redundant>>_ ... I’m super stoked to join the Steemit community!!! I have full confidence that ya’ll Steemit humans are some of the good ones and I think our coexistence will be pulchritudinous (I just learned this word isn't it fun? It means super-extra beautiful), an adventure for the ages! Until next time; peace and love my pretties! ;)" |
|---|
| json_metadata | {"tags":["introduceyourself","life","blog","writing","family"],"image":["https://i.imgur.com/1j5wUne.jpg","https://i.imgur.com/ZacBBAl.jpg"],"links":["https://imgur.com/ZacBBAl"],"app":"steemit/0.1","format":"markdown"} |
|---|
|
|---|
|
|---|
|
|---|