## When is the time to say *"I've had enough"*?

I am a full time freelancer. Born in -85. - I will be 32 this year.

My freelancing career has been *"bumpy"*, just like other things in life. Just like it has for you and others too. - Even so, I'm still here, doing what I love, what I'm passionate about. - *I still Freelance because I don't give up!*

- Back in 2012, when my father passed away, I was ready to give up. Not only on my freelancing career, but on life itself..

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Since that day, I suffer from panic anxiety & depression. I guess it took a lot on me to watch my father die in front of my own eyes, without being able to help him.. - Even so, when the world caved in on me..

- I never gave up. 

My last words to my father was: *"Don't worry, I'll take care of mother."*. - I said those words when he already had passed away. His body was still warm but the body was just a shell. He wasn't there anymore.. 

Due to my panic anxiety and my depression, things have been hard. - Life has given me too much to carry on my shoulders. - ***But I won't quit until my heart stops beating.***

I can't give up. I can't allow myself to quit. - I made a promise to my father and I have to keep that promise. Otherwise, *who am I?*

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## I wanna be a quitter..
Well, in all honesty, I don't want to be a quitter, and that's why I haven't quit. - But sometimes, I really do wish things would end up differently. - I wish I'd wake up some day and realize it was all a bad, horrible dream.

- A nightmare that went on for more than 4 years..

.. And that's where the reality kicks in.

All this crap, ain't no nightmare. It's my life. - It's the cards I have to play with.. So what can I do? - ***I can play the game with the cards I've been dealt.***

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[Image Source](https://www.google.se/url?sa=i&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=images&cd=&cad=rja&uact=8&ved=0ahUKEwi6hqTH143UAhXBFSwKHepGAm4QjhwIBQ&url=http%3A%2F%2Fizquotes.com%2Fquote%2F340774&psig=AFQjCNHE4BUUpsjA7ZCLov648WniDNagMQ&ust=1495892290012354)
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## Play The Game, Adapt, Evolve And Conquer.
That's what I've been trying to do.. That's what I am trying to do. 

However, it's easier said than done. - Life hits hard.

> “Let me tell you something you already know. The world ain't all sunshine and rainbows. It's a very mean and nasty place and I don't care how tough you are it will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently if you let it. You, me, or nobody is gonna hit as hard as life. But it ain't about how hard ya hit. It's about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward. How much you can take and keep moving forward. That's how winning is done!” 
**― Sylvester Stallone, Rocky Balboa**"


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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D_Vg4uyYwEk
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### Rocky never gave up..
- And I will never give up.

At some point, I guess I'll just realize when things are too much to handle, to hard to achieve or reach.. And I'll probably not call myself a quitter if I stop trying to reach those things, if that time comes.. - I will probably just try to say, *"that wasn't for me."*

## That being said..
I want to inspire others. I want to motivate others. - I want someone to say *"I never gave up because of you."* - **That's one of my goals in life.**

My life has been pretty crappy at times and it still is.. But if I can motivate or inspire one single person. Then it's all worth it in the end.

### So for all of you who's thinking about giving up..
- Don't. No matter how hard it is..

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