![20200229180151.jpg](https://files.steempeak.com/file/steempeak/fenngen/NJkUeAGm-2020-02-29-180151.jpg)

Today I haven’t been able to write anything I’m satisfied with. Got bored of all my drafts halfway through… So I decided to follow [my own advice](https://steempeak.com/hive-114105/@fenngen/how-to-never-run-out-of-inspiration-for-your-posts) and answer the two questions:

#### What did I do today?

### How do I feel about that?

*I’ll just be literal about it for a change…*

Today I woke up at 7 in the morning and went outside for a leak. I live in the countryside and prefer going emptying my waste outside every time I can, usually when there’s no one around or I’m not too desperate to take a walk to a more private area haha!

I thought it would be a good idea to stay up and doing some work with the land but It was pretty cold and decided to hop back into bed. I woke up at 10 again feeling very sleepy so I jumped into the computer to wake up a bit.

The first thing I’ve been doing in the mornings is checking out Steem and Facebook, or sometimes the other way around depending on where I posted the most controversial content, which depends on how I felt after I published it. Well, today I think it was Facebook because I asked “to be honest or to be the ideal version of yourself?”, and I was curious about the answers.

After getting my ego filled with likes and comments I got up to fill my belly with bread I had baked the previous night which I accompanied with tomatoes and green beans from the garden. 

![20200213200252.jpg](https://files.steempeak.com/file/steempeak/fenngen/irx5D343-2020-02-13-200252.jpg)

Then I noticed my voting power was at 100% and went on to curating and posting comments so that people can join a [curation trail I'm running, destined to help good posts that have low rewards](https://steempeak.com/hive-114105/@fenngen/interested-in-a-curation-trail-that-helps-ignored-posts-get-more-atention).
 

When I was done it was around 1 PM and I decided to play some guitar and sing. I usually play a very basic progression of chords -sometimes just one chord- and sing one note on top of it, playing more with the intensity, overtones and general vibration, than with varying notes. This usually leads me to a meditative state and I feel great afterward.

<center>

[![](https://img.3speakcontent.online/xkfpvifn/post.png)](https://3speak.online/watch?v=fenngen/xkfpvifn)

▶️ [Watch on 3Speak](https://3speak.online/watch?v=fenngen/xkfpvifn)

</center>

I went outside and started carrying buckets of water over to the [healing circle](https://steempeak.com/hive-123046/@fenngen/healing-circle-showing-interesting-progress-gif-story). I alternated that with some house cleaning and writing in between. Whenever I feel disperse I like to that. Just do several activities at once until I get bored and want to really concentrate on something.

https://steemitimages.com/0x0/https://files.steempeak.com/file/steempeak/fenngen/9Tk1eUBW-watering.gif

After doing that for a while I felt tired and lay on the bead to play Splinterlands. I usually play a lot the last day of the season as it is easy to go higher in ranks and get better season rewards. Made it to Gold II and I hadn’t ever made it so far even when I had some leveled up cards (sold them all so now I only have basic cards).

![Captura de pantalla_20200316_014239.png](https://files.steempeak.com/file/steempeak/fenngen/8GW8v3KI-Captura20de20pantalla_2020-03-16_01-42-39.png)
*I regretted doing that a bit because it took like two hours of my day and my eyes were feeling tired by the end of the session.*

Since the sun was already down I begin to water the garden. In between I kept carrying buckets of water from the stream to the healing circle. I thought about the Bloomberg article that talked about the Steem hostile takeover and I begin to wonder about Justin Sun’s motivation for being the way he is. I decided I would investigate his life and do a non-emotional post about who he is, where he comes from, and all I can find out about him.

I went into the rabbit hole and found out a lot of interesting things. What caught most my attention was the news article from New York Times that covered his [missout on the previous charity lunch with Warren Buffet](https://www.nytimes.com/2019/07/24/business/china-buffett-justin-sun-cryptocurrency.html). 4.6 million dollars paid to eat with that old fart. Insane.

*Though that wasn’t what really got my attention, it was this:*

>#### “As the Chinese authorities take an increasingly heavy-handed approach to policing the business and financial worlds, executives have been known to disappear for months and even years”.

So what they were implying is that Sun might have missed the lunch because he was held back by Chinese authorities. Now if this was true, then it wouldn’t be strange that he now acts as a puppet, whether through business with the government or by threats, perhaps a combination of both.

My mind went on some wild dreams about investigating this deeply and posting it here. I thought of how much attention it would get and also that it could get unwanted attention. I imagined myself being chased by the Chinese government and living in the run.

![image.png](https://files.steempeak.com/file/steempeak/fenngen/0j2apONa-image.png)
*Guess I'll have to go back to [living in the forest...](https://steempeak.com/hive-181465/@fenngen/my-year-living-in-the-forest-in-an-improvised-shelter)*

As my imagination intensified I became scared and felt very uneasy. I took the time to remember who I was and that all that shit was in my head. Also, I thought about how scared I am to take those risks and that perhaps I should poke around the bubble. You know, get to see what happens if it pops.

Later I recorded a video where I talked about a dream. Haven’t seen it yet, will leave it there for another day, perhaps if I see it some other day I will find it serves a purpose. 

My house partner arrived at 10 PM and we smoked a joint. We talked about life, writing, evolving, the people she had met, the thoughts I had on Justin Sun and the Chinese conspiration to dominate Steem.

I came back to my room and played more guitar and sang some more. Now it’s 1:26 AM in Chile and I’m writing this.

### *How do I feel about all this?*

Well, I think it was a good day. It had a little bit of everything. A bit of lazyness, a bit of effort, a bit of suspense, a bit of terror, a bit of breathing, a bit of music. I also chatted with people I love so there was that as well. Perhaps it lacked better food. I only ate bread and vegetables but prepared nothing with dedication. Meh, it's fine, no worries.

I could of been more time off the computer. I feel exhausted by it. I think I will try and make videos these days to avoid reading so much. My eyes have trouble following along with the words.

Anyway, if you’re still here… ***I love you.***

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