HOW TO INTRODUCE THE CULT OF CTHULHU TO YOUR WORKPLACE? by marcoriccardi

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· @marcoriccardi · (edited)
$16.17
HOW TO INTRODUCE THE CULT OF CTHULHU TO YOUR WORKPLACE?
![keep-calm-iรค-iรค-cthulhu-fhtagn.jpg](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmbxom4jPytQQTr53ggc7NviBUCnDefRAsp96rFtM9jtik/keep-calm-i%C3%A4-i%C3%A4-cthulhu-fhtagn.jpg)
***
<br>
The crazy minds behind @crowdmind have launched a contest called [HOW TO INTRODUCE THE CULT OF CTHULHU TO YOUR WORKPLACE?](https://steemit.com/contest/@crowdmind/contest-how-to-introduce-the-cult-of-cthulhu-to-your-workplace).

This is my  concise submission.

***
First of all, it's necessary that you know that I am **actually** introducing the cult of Cthulhu in my workplace for some months already.

The reasons why I'm doing this are the usual: boredom, frustration, a way to express dissent spreading chaos.

To explain my method, I have to start from the basics of Lovecraftian horror.

In H.P. Lovecraft works, horror comes from the **UNKNOWN**, expecially otherwordly. Incredibly ancient and inhuman beings, that should be forever forgotten and unknown, come to the attention of some unfortunate **WITNESS**, driving them to **MADNESS**.

There's no way of salvation, except for very rare cases, and the awareness that humankind is not the dominant culture in the world, but only the last, fragile, patina of rationality over an abyss of infinite depth, both in time and space, where insensitive and obtuse deities act according to instincts that are completely alien to human thought, even they completely ignore human rationality and they could erase it without even realizing it.

So... I believe the best way to introduce the Cult to my workplace should be **inspiring a feeling of ANXIETY for the unknown and the meaningless**.

Since I work in several schools, I started to let here and there **GREAT OLD ONES SYMBOLS** on black and white boards.

My goal is to make people feel uncomfortable and ask themselves the meaning of these mysterious drawings that seem to appear here and there, persecuting them.

![IMG_20190122_095441.jpg](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmZxoVNdEXbUpygzeMeKu5f6wCjoctDZNpaT6V9mZcWaBA/IMG_20190122_095441.jpg)
*This is actually very small, yet in plain sight; some people can notice it where others not; that's good, as those who noticed it could doubt whether to talk to others about it and look a little crazy, or conceal their discovery.*
***

Eventually, someone may read up on this symbol, discovering its correlation with the Cthulhu Myths, and this, besides spreading excellent horror literature, will only lead to further **CONFUSION**:

- Why the symbol of the Great Old Ones appears on the blackboards of several schools?
- Do kids of 6-12 years know Lovecraft? If so, do we have to call social services?
- Is English teacher definetly gone nuts?
- Are all the janitors Dagonians?
- Is someone or something trying to leave a message to someone, or something?
- What's the point with all this?

![IMG_20190121_154244.jpg](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmfQDZFqhAdCsWDc4Z5QaK59pnyzQ61hWnWhfzcUhkxsWU/IMG_20190121_154244.jpg)

*I love this one in particular because it's green. Cthulhu loves green! I tried to get a "color out of space" chalk, but I think I could find it only in the worse kindergarten's bathrooms...*
***

When anxiety and chaos will have spread, it is as if a Cult had already been established in a completely spontaneous way, there is no need for much else (even if using the school switchboard to call random numbers and whisper *"Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn"* could be a nice integration).

![IMG_20190202_073856.jpg](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmPyQUwnkvmDBSfvAnzkhw6LUUABXdnxwhynG4XCqMUhsA/IMG_20190202_073856.jpg)
*The symbol of the Great Old Ones is a **roughly** designed star, which it's very useful as I have to act quickly and I have the artistic skills of a shoggoth*.
***
![IMG_20190205_112746.jpg](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmbwqxPCbjvExKKzAUfqgmqCUGyZ9JoC2RC5UkMeUDepQq/IMG_20190205_112746.jpg)
*At a certain moment, to spread even more confusion, I started to create bizarre alternative symbols.*
***
![IMG_20190220_143935.jpg](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmPjKkRtnhLxpvyep7boSiJRrYF1a3oDt6pQzdR3ijcHmr/IMG_20190220_143935.jpg)
*This makes me very proud: it has lasted for three weeks hidden behind the calendar, from where it continues to spread its nefarious influence. It could be discovered in years! This says a lot about school hygiene, among other things...*
***


Well! That's all! I'm going to sleep, since I have to be at work in four hours and I'm still here at the PC, writing crap...

Iรค! Iรค! Cthulhu fhtagn! to all of you and families, not to mention your goats with a thousand young!


P.S.: Beware of seafood, if you're allergic like Uncle Howard ....

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@nyarlathotep ·
$0.02
Your efforts are noted, my child. When the stars are right, you will receive the proper reward.
๐Ÿ‘  
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@marcoriccardi ·
So lucky! Or not...
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@curie ·
Congrats on a Curie vote!
Hi marcoriccardi,
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This post  has been upvoted by the Curie community curation project and associated vote trail as exceptional content (human curated and reviewed).  Have a great day :) <br>
 
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@theironfelix ·
Yah got a freakinโ€™ @curie @marcoriccardi!~
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@bananafish · (edited)
$0.09
This is the unfathomable and non-Euclidean power of the Great Cthulhu!!!

(Marco)
๐Ÿ‘  
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@f3nix ·
$0.04
We want to see your Cthulhian delirium @theironfelix!
๐Ÿ‘  
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@bidesign ·
Nice story๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ‘

Posted using [Partiko iOS](https://steemit.com/@partiko-ios)
๐Ÿ‘  
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@marcoriccardi ·
Thank you!
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@steemitboard ·
Congratulations @marcoriccardi! You have completed the following achievement on the Steem blockchain and have been rewarded with new badge(s) :

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@delishtreats ·
$0.39
When the day comes, you'll be one of those who will be chosen :D

This would be an amazing entry to comedy open mic too. Have you heard about this contest before?

I can't imagine that anyone would blame an adult person for these signs. I must say that you're not that good at drawing and it does look like it's a work of a little boy/girl :D so you're fine and I'm sure that you won't be suspected of these deeds :D 

I guess it lasted three weeks until it was discovered behind the calendar as it was a new month, wasn't it? :D I wouldn't touch my calendar until the next month either :)

Great story! Good luck with the contest! :) 

Have a nice weekend :)
๐Ÿ‘  , , , , ,
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vote details (6)
@marcoriccardi ·
$0.03
Knowing a little about the Great Old Ones, being chosen will not end well for me...
I've heard of open mic, but my ability to talk in English is comparable to my ability to draw the Derleth's Elder Sign, so I must decline the suggestion...
The Elder Sign is described as a "five-pointed star that has been distorted along its lines and contains an eye-flame symbol in the center". The fact I draw them so bad is *partially* due to my try to make them "distorted".
Last time I checked, the one behind the calendar was still there...
Thank you for reading my delusions, have a nice weekend you too
๐Ÿ‘  
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vote details (1)
@theironfelix ·
$0.03
Of course, one of the great olโ€™ Grandmasters dโ€™Italia chose to contribute towards the great efforts of conversion and religious acceptance for Cthulhu, the Great Old One. I must be giving high praise and charity for such a great act to even commit to your guide and say you have given us a good particular case for your guide. Just liken to the post made by @calluna whence she had infilitrated the magazine / news journalism space for oure recruiting efforts. So far into such and so well crafted are these two posts that I must relish in saying ye two deserve thy @curie upvotes.<br>
<i>(If I were to remark crudely, it seems as if the entries have yet to cite directly from the Cthulhan [expunged by Spookyโ€™s Secret Services for even an obscure reference to the works that shall not be named... reproccessing comment string:] works, often misnomered to be the Cthulhu mythos, and the Necronomicon in the sweet, eldritch language. One only the true believers can see, so as to truly conceal oure toungues from heathens and heretics that wish to wedge oure communities apart. And equally so that we can truly find oure supporters and not clowns that think this irony. However, seems as we maybe able to recruit new followers to the cause and I shall bleed so as to convert and cite the texts as to makr that possible for future recruitment and less straying away from oure Great Old One.)</i><br>
In any such case, let us now go back to say that at certain parts I felt the post itself was a mere diary entry that one cleverly snuck in. Other points a blog post on a blog site, dunno what made me feel that one on a blog post site such as this; the diary one makes sense with yer acute loving moments as points. With those two cases, I must congratulate yah again on earning that @curie upvote, drawn those suck- I mean curious folks to support oure efforts and strides. Well done, barrzo dobrze!~<br>
<center>So keep on making conversions, use them haikus to slice up on some foolios and happy steeming!!!!~
![F84E696A-C630-4818-A82F-0C110C642689.gif](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmVxckp7YS1HGn96q2mC6GPkXdSQdVofLJvTaaRZTV6Bca/F84E696A-C630-4818-A82F-0C110C642689.gif)</center>
๐Ÿ‘  ,
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@marcoriccardi ·
Abdul Alhazred, is this you? :P
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@theironfelix ·
<center>XP
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@f3nix ·
$0.06
> I tried to get a "color out of space" chalk

Hahah. I don't know there's this meteorite in my garden, maybe you want to create a chalk out of it?
You lazy ass! You didn't want to write this and I had to push you and look now.. a wonderful piece, clever and sickly didactic! I love it, you didn't exaggerate and you actually described one of the best strategies to spread uncertainty and that needed sparkle of madness in everyday life (remember my fly in the archive?). Most of all, what's better than someone that answers "oh that? I'm already doing it since months". Genius.
๐Ÿ‘  ,
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@marcoriccardi ·
I slept 3 hours, who's the lazy ass? :P
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@f3nix · (edited)
$0.03
Is this all you've to tell me after my lovely message? I don't care of your late night darkweb activities ๐Ÿ˜‚
๐Ÿ‘  
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@wisejg ·
Your post seemed very rewarding to read. apart from that you motivated me to leave simbilos out there. to spread the cult to Cthulhu
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@bananafish ·
$0.10
This is good! Cthulhu fhtagn!
๐Ÿ‘  
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@cyemela ·
Hidden symbols are everywhere. Ha ha.
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@marcoriccardi ·
Everywhere...but I'm gonna change symbols
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@ferrate ·
Lovely symbols plus lovely thoughts behind them. I really love every piece you have in there and I love your choice of pictures too. I know the trend to promote this lovely cause will make a great difference in the life of other students and schools as a whole. 

I hope you enjoyed your four hours sleep. But I will still say sleep like a baby..... Lol. 
I really enjoyed every bit of you in there. Great post and keep the writing spirit up

Posted using [Partiko Android](https://steemit.com/@partiko-android)
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@marcoriccardi ·
Thank you very much!
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@ferrate ·
You are humbly welcome

Posted using [Partiko Android](https://steemit.com/@partiko-android)
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@jacobtothe · (edited)
https://youtu.be/XxScTbIUvoA

But isn't the elder sign supposed to be a ward *against* the Great Old Ones?
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@bananafish ·
$0.09
You don't try to ward against something that you don't believe it exist
๐Ÿ‘  ,
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@jacobtothe ·
Valid point.
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@scribblingramma ·
Even though I don't know a great deal bout cthulhu, your story still made me laugh, perhaps because I taught school many years ago and wish I had thought up something like this 'way back then!
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@marcoriccardi ·
I'm glad to have given you a good laugh!
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@markkujantunen ·
Redundant. For the bottom decile, real wages have not risen in the USA since the 1970's.
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@marcoriccardi ·
Prematurata con scappellamento a destra
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@bananafish ·
$0.08
Non dimenticare gli antani!!
๐Ÿ‘  
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vote details (1)
@zoexantelamv ·
$0.03
This post was nominated by a @curie curator to be featured in an upcoming Author Showcase that will be posted in about 12 hours on the @curie blog.

NOTE: If you would like us to NOT feature your post in the Author Showcase please reply, or DM me on Discord as soon as possible. Any photos or quoted text from your post that we feature will be properly attributed to you as the author.

 - If you would like to provide a brief statement about your posting, your life or anything else to be included in the article, you can do so in reply here or look me up on Discord chat (@ Zoe Anavid#9686).  This personal addition to my article can be of great value.

You can check out <a href="https://steemit.com/travel/@curie/curie-author-showcase-february-18-2019">a previous Author Showcase I wrote</a> to get an idea of what we are doing with these posts.

Thanks for your time and for creating great content.

Zoe (@curie curator)

<img src="https://i.postimg.cc/9FtbZm6j/Curie---_Author-_Showcase---_Radial-_Gradient-_BG.gif">
๐Ÿ‘  ,
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vote details (2)
@marcoriccardi ·
Thank you!

I'm a bit surprised about the attention given to my humourous post. 
If you want to include a little statement to the article, you can use this:

"I'm an Italian guy who's constantly trying to find the funny side in the nonsense, gray, everyday routine. I write games, poems and silly things."
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@tristancarax ·
$0.03
Your plan is seriously diabolical and I'm now calling the cult of child services.

*ring - ring* "Hello"

"I like to report..."

"How on earth did that cult survive. We'll get right on it. No one shall out-do us!"

haha
๐Ÿ‘  ,
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vote details (2)
@hlezama ·
Hahaha. This was hillarious.
I loved the one hidden behind the callendar. What schools are we talking about?
It made me remember my HS. We made an experiment when we started and proved that for 5 years noone cleaned the windows of any classroom. We had left some messages written and 5 years later they were still there. Had I known Lovecraft then I might have concocted something far more sinister.
For our graduation speech the principal wanted me to include a note thanking the janitorial team, as a courtesy. Hell no!
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@marcoriccardi ·
I can relate!
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