The Promise by meesterboom

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· @meesterboom ·
$38.81
The Promise
![meesterboom-the-promise_1.jpg](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmWVecJmxhf94jz2sNNhs3qcVMGzvWhVwVzR22PsJ5tvtE/meesterboom-the-promise_1.jpg)

Tonight I am going out on the *ran-dan,* as they say in Scotland which in essence means going out for drinks with friends. I am rather looking forward to it. 

Of course, when I say that the *ran-dan* means going out for drinks with friends I am not being entirely honest. It actually means going out to get rip-roaringly drunk. 

![Dcyvzh.jpg](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmShFvbtqBxdb5TEG2RoNbVvhmnv5QyDrxV32r9nzs5LHo/Dcyvzh.jpg)

We have many ways of describing the delicious art of getting drunk here in Scotland. I think because it is such a common occurrence that we have to have lots of ways of referring to it. You know, like the Eskimos with all their words for snow. 

So if you see an unfamiliar word in the post just assume it means very drunk.

In preparation for the mammoth drinking session ahead, I met my mate *Webby* for lunch to discuss what the general plans were. 

![Dcyvzh_20180608132655749.jpg](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmVxP7G8UuVcF4fbpxwhqyer8X4dCsVwkjQozUvm5Qw7T3/Dcyvzh_20180608132655749.jpg)

*I can't wait to get mawkit.* 

He said, over a coffee. 

*Me neither dude. It's been a fair old while since I was out in the wild.*

*Aye well, tonight is the night mate. We are gonna get __blootered!__*

*Yay!*

Said I, in a slightly small voice. A part of me already dreading the inevitable early rise with the little boom. 

Once again I had to face the question. 

*Am I getting too old for this shit?*

I mean. I haven't even started and already I am dreading the next day. In the past I used to scoff at hangovers and ridicule those who feared them.

Whilst I was pondering the hangover and tribulations to be faced the next day, I noticed *Webby* had become a little pensive. 

![Dcyvzh_20180608132935446.jpg](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmTVABWnQpphHGHZgb56CFn5b9K4GwynuiTcb8qzpAmAZU/Dcyvzh_20180608132935446.jpg)

*You alright dude?*

I enquired?

*Aye, aye. Well, sort of, you know.*

He paused and then took a breath. 

*Do me a favour though mate eh? Make sure I __don't__ get a kebab tonight.*

![Dcyvzh_20180608133103893.jpg](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmf2dy8fdBbY1AkQpGwDw6dKKbTvkjhHe7MoverXJVdUpv/Dcyvzh_20180608133103893.jpg)

*But you love a kebab? Especially when you are drunk.*

He paused again. Then seemed to make up his mind. 

*You ever had to stick a finger up your arse?*

I made a *this ice cream tastes like jizzum* kind of face.

*Ermm, what? A finger up my chuff? Eh, of course not. Well, maybe. Once, sort of. Why?* 

![Dcyvzh_20180608133356134.jpg](https://cdn.steemitimages.com/DQmdc3v4ZGACuTg2nhGfNmmaQjTpPRQZ2KQDehjxvXambfv/Dcyvzh_20180608133356134.jpg)

*The piles man, my arse is pure broke. Bleeds like a bastard after a kebab.*

*Oh, right. That's nice.*

He looked at me like a man reliving the horrors of the war. 

*Aye, I have to stick this pile cream stuff up it. Especially after a kebab. Kebabs are bad, man.*

I winced in sympathy, then brightened. 

*I might get one. My arse is alright.*

He looked at me darkly, then spoke with a touch of jealousy in his tone. 

*Aye well, lucky for some. Just promise me, alright?*

*Alright mate, I promise to stop you getting a kebab so you won't have to stand in a sea of blood fingering yourself in the morning.*

He nodded. 

*Cheers mate. I owe you.*

I nodded and smiled.

Maybe I am not the one that should be worried that I am too old for this shit.
👍  , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , and 72 others
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vote details (136)
@roselover ·
Going out with friends is something special and very beautiful
Great article
I wish you the best times, my friend
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@meesterboom ·
As long at there are no bleedy arses though!!
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@bookeyclaudia ·
lovely write up, hope to read more from you.
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@meesterboom ·
$0.03
Did you like the bit about the finger in the arse and the arse cream?

I do hope so
👍  
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vote details (1)
@beginningtoend ·
$0.06
Been at the beach this week, ran into a few fellas who were mawkit, but never reached that level myself.
👍  
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vote details (1)
@meesterboom ·
It's a fine thing, I am quite looking forward to reaching that level!!
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@haikubot ·
$0.03
<em>It's a fine thing, I 
Am quite looking forward to 
Reaching that level!! 
</em>
&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<sup>- meesterboom</sup>

---
<sup><sup><em>I'm a bot. I detect haiku.</em></sup></sup>
👍  ,
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vote details (2)
@tamaralovelace ·
$0.06
Well at least he didn't ask you to do the fingering lol....should be a right fun night.  Enjoy...and drink like there's no tomorrow.  Deal with it in the a.m. lol
👍  
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vote details (1)
@meesterboom ·
$0.02
Oh lord, that would be a whole different kind of tale!!

Yes, tomorrow can hump itself!! :0D
👍  
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@alfiandaud ·
Very useful. Thanks for sharing this post with us and wishing you an great day. Stay blessed
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@artizm ·
$0.03
ahah :) I do not think you're old for that!
👍  
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vote details (1)
@meesterboom ·
Hehe, I don't either!!
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@riya99 ·
$0.03
Actually, in the world, I think friendship is the biggest relationship. You have gone out with the sisters, you have done the prince. In fact, if you spend time with friends, then those days will not be forgotten. If you live in steadfast friendship but do not get drunk you will see but jins will not let you do this thing Always try to miss it in mind and if you can hopefully do something, hopefully your Thank you very much for your important post in the
👍  ,
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vote details (2)
@meesterboom · (edited)
**This.**
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@riya99 ·
Thank you very much
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@ocrdu ·
$0.03
Do it more regularly, and you'll never be old at all!
👍  
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@meesterboom ·
That's an idea and a half. Consider it done, now, if someone could handle my divorce?...
👍  
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@muzac ·
something very fantastic time we can get together with your friends although just a drink and share stories, good luck with your
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@meesterboom ·
something was triumphant you can I over seventeens with the good course
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@cecicastor ·
$0.06
There comes a time in one's life Mr. Boom, where you have to weigh the good and bad about living the life of a much younger person. Go out and enjoy it while you can, just don't drink and drive. The little booms need their Dad!
👍  
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vote details (1)
@meesterboom ·
If there is one thing that can be said about me is that I never do that! The drink drive bit, it shall do the go out and be jolly bit!!!! :0)
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@cecicastor ·
$0.03
That's okay Boom, as long as you don't ride with a drunk either! **:}**
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@bigskycustoms ·
$0.03
Wow a bit TMI right there! Cripes I’m considerably older than you and I’m not that worried about things but yes getting hammered as you guys!
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@meesterboom ·
It was a bit too much, I felt a sympathy pang in my sphincter when he told me!!
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@pamcooks ·
$0.06
@meesterboom really do appreciate your terminology as they are familiar in my neck of the woods.lol. So basically you got rat arsed and totally bladdered. ( Make sure no drink and drive)

Bless your mate.He can have a kebab just lay of the blimmen chilli he will be fine then.Just have loads of mayo should sooth him a little.Whether he takes it internally or externally if you get my drift.lmao🤣🤣🤣🤣
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@meesterboom ·
Lol, I don't think it's the chilli, although surely they can't help. I think it's the meat!!!

Don't worry, in Scotland we are car free drinkers!
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@pamcooks ·
$0.03
Really.He needs to go on mumsnet.They would give him better advice then the docs.Some herbal remedys.Just give him your fries you have the kebab.Your good to go.lol.
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@bennierex ·
$0.10
That feeling of dreading the next morning... oh man I wish I was 19 again :)
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@meesterboom ·
Lol, that's half the problem, so do I!!
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@sisygoboom ·
$0.07
We face a similar situation in the toon, you can pretty much as "ed" onto the end of any word and it'll be a word for mortal:
- smashed
- bladdered
- f*cked
- pissed
- mashed
- floored

I never used to get hangovers either, but now at the grand old age of 19, I already suffer bad, can't wait till 30 years time!
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@meesterboom ·
I tell ya, they get exponentially worse after thirty!!

Hehe, I love all those terms!! So similar!
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@fictionspawn ·
$0.03
Haha! I know that feeling! :D The hangovers which used to be such an easy match... Times change, times change. Thanks for the story, I enjoyed it a lot.
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@meesterboom ·
Glad you liked it!! :0)
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@broncofan99 ·
$0.03
I'm no doctor but if a Kabab is gonna make his arse bleed he just might want to get that checked out. At the same time, that is a task I don't want anything to do with if I'm planning on getting fall down shitfaced. I'll be lucky enough to control my own stupidity let alone worrying about a Kabab tearing him up inside.
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@meesterboom ·
Hehe, be did get it checked out. It's proper big piles, like grapes apparently!! 

I shall send him your way for a second opinion ;0)
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@jcedwards ·
$0.07
Wow, it's been years since I got totally shit-faced ... and at least that long since I had a hangover, lol.  Have a great time, but leave some for your beer tasting tomorrow night!  :)
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@meesterboom ·
$0.02
I am quite shit of the faced now!! Raaaar!!!
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@jcedwards ·
$0.03
LMAO!  Definitely looking forward to your posts tomorrow!  :D
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@brianphobos ·
$0.03
Never too old man!
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@meesterboom ·
Yeah!!!
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@steemitboard ·
Congratulations @meesterboom! You have completed some achievement on Steemit and have been rewarded with new badge(s) :

[![](https://steemitimages.com/70x80/http://steemitboard.com/notifications/commented.png)](http://steemitboard.com/@meesterboom) Award for the number of comments received

<sub>_Click on the badge to view your Board of Honor._</sub>
<sub>_If you no longer want to receive notifications, reply to this comment with the word_ `STOP`</sub>


To support your work, I also upvoted your post!


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@hndmarshall ·
$0.03
repercussions dude ...repercussions...lol
if you think of them ......yup your too old.....lol

upvoted and resteemed
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@meesterboom ·
I am too old. At least I feel it today!
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@sandrina.life ·
$0.03
AUHAUAHUAHUAHAUHAUHAUAHUAHUAHA
THIS WAS FUNNY AS FUCK!
First of all, I'm going to re-use the "get mawkit" expression.
Second, you are NEVER never too old to feel young.
Third, your friend talking about hemorrhoids with you is the most liberating thing you could do. I hope you took the kebab and ate it in front of him, as the glorious bastards do.
:D
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@meesterboom ·
I almost did, but at the end I was so mawkit that I couldnt really concentrate enough!!
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@cjao20 ·
$0.03
The wise people of the street say that "each head is a world" and that is that we don't know what thoughts or problems are circling in the head of each person
https://steamcdn-a.akamaihd.net/steam/apps/800020/header.jpg?t=1523998493
[](https://steamcdn-a.akamaihd.net/steam/apps/800020/header.jpg?t=1523998493)
***Close that arse Webby, because the killer Kebab comes for his.***

Now @meesterboom, as you intuit, your problem will not be so simple either:
https://pics.onsizzle.com/just-washing-my-balls-~eddie~-7499906.png
[](https://pics.onsizzle.com/just-washing-my-balls-~eddie~-7499906.png
)
***Here I am waiting for you Daddy Bear***
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@meesterboom ·
Lol, that is quite the site to behold! 

The problem was solved... I think!
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@afiqsejuk ·
$0.03
Ooooo, KEBABS! I love it man, especially the meat. It is so juicy! Upvoted!
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@meesterboom ·
We didn't but we should have!
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@gvand ·
$0.03
Typical plan an outing with friends to get drunk and then end up talking about politics and serious issues like the economy or global warming lol xD
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@meesterboom ·
There was no such frivolous talk lol!!
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@anneke · (edited)
$0.03
Too old?  Hmmmm I do not think men will ever admit that -  It was my husband's bday yesterday and he DID NOT get the memo that we are getting too old but luckily for him, we do not have a baby so he can sleep and recover the whole day...Now the question is since it is the next day, did you do your duties as 'stop your friend from eating a kebab'??
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@meesterboom ·
There were no kebabs!! I feel awful. Oh dear!!
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@anneke · (edited)
$0.03
Yes we were talking about that .... we still love to have a braai and visit with friends, but it is not like 20 years ago any more where you could do it the whole weekend.  Now Friday a party (not too late) and recover the rest of the weekend :)
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@old-guy-photos ·
$0.03
Like my farmer buddy that is tough as nails but is turning 79 says: getting old aint for sissies!
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@meesterboom ·
Lol, that is very true!
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@naydenova ·
$0.03
I get a hangover after drinking just two beers nowadays... two beers! TWO BEERS! And I go for the ones with lower alcohol percentage and still.
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@meesterboom ·
Oh dear, that's rough! I am a little better than that :0)
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@jedau ·
$0.03
Haha! We all know your sordid history with kebabs, dudester. We don't want no haranguing during a hangover now, don't we? Best to keep things *unproteined* for the time being!
👍  
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vote details (1)
@meesterboom · (edited)
$0.15
Such wise words. No one could argue with them least they

*<sub>lament...</sub>*
👍  
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vote details (1)
@jedau ·
$0.02
Will they? Have they? Is it something intrinsically linked to every fiber of their being? Dare I say, in their DNA!? Lament indeed!!!
👍  
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vote details (1)