Thank you, I aprecciate your thoughtful response, I see all of us suffering to some degree the betrayal I suffered as a child. That's how I can see abusers without hating them. Many identified with those that abused them. I was taught we are born through our past intentions, it's our karma in a way, whether through past lives or the actions and intentions we manifest throughout our day. 

I had 4 children, they were born without good or bad traits, but they all had certain proclivities that need to be cultivated correctly or their  talents or characteristics can turn destructive. All my kids are kind and caring, I didn't pass on my conditioning!