"How-To Reach Out for Help..." - Motivation Moment #26 by coachmelleow

howto · @coachmelleow · Apr 19 '18 (edited)

$5.90

"How-To Reach Out for Help..." - Motivation Moment #26

A few years ago, a friend reached out to me for financial help. He was going through a tough time with his business and I agreed, after checking in with my spouse of course! We agreed to loan him $XX thousands.

I thought that was over and done with, and then that same person when into deeper financial difficulty and requested for another round of $XX thousands. We agreed the second time.

And you would think twice was enough, he then approached us the third time and by now I was really concerned about it, worst of all he offered us to "Buy Into" his business, so that we will get back our money with X% of his business equity. Hmmmm, this was when alarm bells went off!

To tell you the truth, I'm not rolling in cash, and I'm extremely cautious at lending, but I was moved with Compassion.

I declined helping him the third time as we too were getting into debt because we possibly would not be able to see our money for a long time coming.

Fast-track and now in 2018, I thank GOD that my same friend is doing much better now, and his new business entity has just signed a few key deals that looks promising in days ahead. Good news is, I've started to get paid back in monthly instalments :)

![an-tinh.jpeg](https://steemitimages.com/DQmVvYEBQ9WyUMw2NmuG4fQ5ZH6xdDzgWN5PvgBSXCJ13TH/an-tinh.jpeg)
[Source](http://file.vforum.vn/hinh/2016/01/an-tinh.jpg)

Why am I sharing the story above?
--------------------

In today's fast and flashy world, living within our means may not be the advise people are heeding. There are many people that I personally know that are living outside their means, which means they are getting into debt very quickly.

I was just joking with a close friend about the fact that ***Instagram could kill her generation***. The need to look good with a "Cold Brew" Coffee each day, eat at fancy eateries, travel for the sake of taking the best insta-pics and just outrightly living a lifestyle that is expected of you -- it is all just unthinkable but it is happening!

>***In February 2018, U.S. consumer debt rose 3.3 percent to $3.867 trillion. That surpassed last month's record of $3.857 trillion. And part of that is Credit card debt that totalled $1.031 trillion.***
[Source](https://www.thebalance.com/consumer-debt-statistics-causes-and-impact-3305704)

**Are you struggling Financially as well? Or perhaps... Are struggling in other Non-Financial related areas?**

The BIG Questions are... *"Are you Reaching Out?"*... and if Yes, then the next question *"Who are you Reaching Out to?"*

It's a real situation in the world we live in. And there many are struggling in silence about it. It's time to NOT stay quiet about it.

>***"Asking for help does not mean that we are weak or incompetent. It usually indicates an advanced level of honesty and intelligence"*** ~ ***Anne Wilson Schaef***

5 Steps on "How-To Reach Out for Help..."
-------------------

**1. Listen In**
God in all His Wisdom gave us a few things; one is conscience, the other is common-sense and yet another is foresight. Now I know it may not be too common to 'everyone', but many have heard their inner being or intuition tell them something more than the obvious tell-tale-signs could. You just have to listen in and earlier the better.

**2. Acknowledge the Need for Help**
This is often the hardest step. Why? It's because it gets us to a position to come down from our perceived high horse, and walk the earth. Yes, it means coming face to face with reality, the hard-hitting facts. If we are broke, we are broke. If you cannot afford something, you just can't. No two ways about it.

**3. Reach Out for Help**
Don't be embarrassed to ask for help. Everyone needs a little bit of help at different stages of their life. And there could be rougher seas that some have to go through. The worst thing is keeping silent and NOT asking for help, whilst just sweeping it under the carpet. Please don't do that. It may come back and bite you even harder if not addressed.

**4. Break It Down to Small Actionable Steps**
Sometimes facing the BIG problem is just too overwhelming. The problem can be better solved when it is broken down into little actionable steps ahead. It's what I call "Chunking Down" the challenge into Baby Steps over a more manageable period of time. *"Solve it in 1 year or 3 years"* may be more palatable vs. *"Solve it over the next 3 months!"*

**5. Circle of Support**
Don't wait till you are in trouble before creating your Circle of Support. This could be people you trust and are older, wiser or just people you respect for their credibility or integrity. Get them on board today. Always have people who have gone ahead of you to be able to give you a different perspective over life, decisions and way forward.

![Hands-1200x480.jpeg](https://steemitimages.com/DQmdrGP8YVXursFMSGwL7ZvkZRPWQZjnaUKTCfrz9QMcnR4/Hands-1200x480.jpeg)
[Source](http://www.equalrightswashington.org/wp-content/uploads/2016/01/Hands-1200x480.jpg)

And for those who may not be in need of help, you too have a responsibility to be "WATCHFUL" and sensitive for friends and family members who may be struggling but have not yet asked for help. Will you be ready to HELP before help is asked?

>***I met a Coach in the States recently over a Zoom call and every time before he ends the call he would ask... "Is there anything I can do for you?" WOW, he offers help when it has not even been asked! What an amazing attitude and choice of just being present and available. Blows my mind.***

Hope this post helps you. Please share it to others or resteem it, if you feel this helps.

I think today's post is the Longest "Motivation Moment" I've written. It's cool :)

Remember to be a Blessing out there! Over to you.
________________________________________

Stay tuned for more "Motivation Moments"...

Mel @coachmelleow

![MotivationMomentWithMel.jpg](https://steemitimages.com/DQmNYvUwh6hghnnezu8xNiLnc2qYAtTz3MbuEajXTcijt3F/MotivationMomentWithMel.jpg)

Everyone needs a little push, a little encouragement, a little inspiration ~ every single day.

That's why I created Motivation Moments to help you move forward.

If you benefited from this post, please give it an Upvote or Resteem it...Thank you! 😊

***Sharing is caring.***

Get your Past Motivation Moments here...
------------------

- "3 Lessons to Life's Challenges..." - [Motivation Moment #25](https://steemit.com/motivation/@coachmelleow/3-lessons-to-life-s-challenges-motivation-moment-25)
- "3 Steps to Overcome Monday Blues..." - [Motivation Moment #24](https://steemit.com/motivation/@coachmelleow/3-steps-to-overcome-monday-blues-motivation-moment-24)
- "Rest UP..." - [Motivation Moment #23](https://steemit.com/motivation/@coachmelleow/rest-up-motivation-moment-23)
- "Are You Open To Learn?" - [Motivation Moment #22](https://steemit.com/motivation/@coachmelleow/are-you-open-to-learn-motivation-moment-22)
- "The Movie of Your LIFE..." - [Motivation Moment #21](https://steemit.com/motivation/@coachmelleow/the-movie-of-your-life-motivation-moment-21)

👍 hendrikdegrote, ausbitbank, kevinwong, claudiop63, centerlink, pharesim, hr1, meerkat, choogirl, curie, passive, kushed, aaronmcheong, maverickfoo, anwenbaumeister, webcoop, ccoin, teamaustralia, littlenewthings, milagros, coachmelleow, agussafrizal, myach, urs, massivevibration, liberosist, laurasusannah, inversionistam, con-dom, jotmax, younesshilal, bitrocker2020, robin1991, steemnews-fr, benleemusic, vilma17, elizacheng, crypto3d, superoo7-dev, craftsofluv, tadstrange, poeticammo, thinknzombie, cryptwo, williamsyee, gtpjfoodbank, diamondray, vannour, halleyleow, vaelriey, bobdos, tifaong, bmj, vinnieleow, casperleow, seekgod, arconite, ryenneleow, mikepedro, afrikablr, kevinli, onartbali, stahlberg, hoperimmel, and 35 others

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@teammalaysia · Apr 17 '18

$0.03

#### You've been upvoted by **TeamMalaysia** community. Here are trending posts by other **TeamMalaysia** authors at http://steemit.com/trending/teammalaysia
To support the growth of TeamMalaysia Follow our upvotes by using **steemauto.com** and follow trail of @myach

Vote **TeamMalaysia** witness bitrocker2020 using this link <a href="https://v2.steemconnect.com/sign/account-witness-vote?witness=bitrocker2020&approve=true">vote for witness</a>

👍 coachmelleow

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@aaronmcheong · Apr 17 '18

$0.03

Glad to hear that your friend is doing much better now, and you're getting your money back (slowly but surely perhaps)? :)

What's equally important to those reaching out for help is also for others to lend a helping hand whenever possible!! The idea of having a Circle of Support is amazing, will be building my own circle from now on before it's too late.

Great sharing @coachmelleow, excited to be building something new!

👍 coachmelleow

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@coachmelleow · Apr 17 '18

Really appreciate your comment and feedback Bro! You too continue to press on. 

Love the fact that we have a community here in #teammalaysia that will support one another. 😊👍🏻

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@tifaong · Apr 17 '18

$0.03

Fortunately, you're getting your money back. When I reach the paragraph "We declined the third time", I thought outright that you won't get your money back because that's the common case.

I used to be stuck at #2 because I don't know that I needed help, or asking for help just never crossed my mind. But after I consciously acknowledge that I need help, things got a lot easier. My project can move forward.

I think it's best to get a Circle of Support that can help you in various areas in life. A financial expert, a manager, a mentor, a customer service agent, etc. You know, people from different industry and background.

👍 coachmelleow

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@coachmelleow · Apr 18 '18

Spot on @tifaong thanks for your comment 😊👍🏻

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@tifaong · Apr 18 '18

Hehehe you're welcome :)

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