<center>![ashley-madison-adultery-lips-shh-600.jpg](https://steemitimages.com/DQmPB1fFdWQyj5bgAjTZrXtc65S1ReG5rTX1xbgzLRkD7xH/ashley-madison-adultery-lips-shh-600.jpg)</center>

<br>

<b>For us frisky folks it’s best to keep our partners off Steemit, but if you’re like me and you met the love of your life, @cathi-xx, on Steemit, then you have to be extra careful.</b>

<br>

<center><h1>Slang Is Good!</h1></center>

Using slang when asking strange women to swap STDs can save your ass when your sneaky partner pops out of a sewer grate, like a ninja turtle, just in time to hear everything. 

Although, you should avoid slang that your partner is familiar with, for instance, @cathi-xx is British, so, when she’s around I cannot use the phrase _“Fancy a bit of slap and tickle?”_ to any hot little number that we meet on the street.

<br>

<center><h1>Don’t Be Stupid!</h1></center>

I know that every guy’s first instinct, after bopping a girl on the head and taking her back to their cave, is to post about it on Steemit, but slow down there quickdraw, you have to be smart about this! 

It is best to not post anything, but I understand those are just meaningless words like _“Keep it in your pants!”_ 

So, if you are like me and you must post, instead of using the heading: _I Just Went To Bed With A College Girl And Woke Up To A Middle Schooler, WTF Do I Do?_ try using a heading that doesn’t draw to much attention, like: _How To Cheat When Your Partner Is On Steemit_ and then claim that you tend to exaggerate to keep your posts funny and interesting. 

<br>

<center><h1>Make Her Laugh!</h1></center>

Making her laugh is probably the most important tool in your cheating arsenal. With a generous portion of humor you can literally tell her anything and as long as she laughs when you say it, you’re still in an honest relationship. 

Also, if you are worried about getting caught in the act try cheating with clowns, now, I know they may not be your first choice when lacing up your dancing shoes, but imagine your partner catching you neck deep in some clown ass. 

She would probably just assume that she walked in on a hilarious magic trick and you know that you are doing it right when your partner interrupts your, _“Baby, let me explain!”_ with, _“Perform that funny trick again so I can post pictures to Steemit.”_ 

Now instead of spending the rest of the night picking your clothes up off the lawn, the two of you could enjoy a romantic evening entertained by BimBozo, while playing with balloon animals.

<center><h2>If you follow this simple guide, you will keep your love happy.</h2></center>


<center>![affair.jpg](https://steemitimages.com/DQmYbKP9qpQhWdZwMQah4sQXndauNP2N5WAdbjX5eJmxHSs/affair.jpg)</center>

[Image One](https://www.ashleymadison.com)
[Image Two](http://www.netdoctor.co.uk/healthy-living/sexual-health/a2207/coping-with-an-affair/)

<br>

<center>![I'm Oznog, bitch!.jpeg](https://steemitimages.com/DQmewB3eBnDJoJL157Zw5iWYFe3dssUA41VSQGEHKmA6ARs/I'm%20Oznog%2C%20bitch!.jpeg)</center>